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Monkeywatch - November 2013


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Baht buses are becoming a real bloody nightmare these days. One harks back to the halcyon days when all you had to do was stick your hand out and you would be spirited to your destination in the wink of an eye. These days, if you aren’t part of some fuckwit tour group you may as well stick your hand up your arse for all the good it’ll do you. You have to wait until some driver comes along tooting his horn like he’s just had it for his birthday before you’re likely to be going anywhere. And even then, the ordeal continues. A trip down Beach Road the other day took the best part of half an hour. First of all the bus pulls up outside Central Festival, at which point a crowd of Indian imbeciles decide to have a five minute chat with the driver and manage to negotiate a 10 baht fare down to 50 baht. When will these fucktards get it through their thick heads that you don’t have to talk to the driver every time you get on a bloody baht bus? They’re the same in fast food joints. It takes them longer to buy a few burgers than it’d take most people to buy a house. But we digress. Next stop is Mike Shopping Mall where some continental cretin tries to pay his fare with a 1000 baht note. Another five minutes to sort that out. Then came the inevitable traffic jams exacerbated by the Beach Road “improvements”, so the driver then stops to try and pick up a group of people, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they’re the same ones who got off his bus a minute earlier but had overtaken it because they were moving faster than the traffic. Finally got to Walking Street, utterly devoid of the will to live. If you’re in a hurry these days, your best bet is to bloody well walk.

 

Someone needs to suggest to the management of the Tahitian Queen that they offer a two for one drink special to anyone presenting a movie stub from Central Festival after 6pm--rest stop for those travelling to Walking Street by shank's mare.

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Monkeyman, I could not help but detect a note of disgruntlement in this installment vis-a-vis our subcontinental brethren?

 

And continental too, as in the loon with the 1000 baht note. Definitely a European, but I couldn't pin down the accent. :clueless

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