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A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client and said to him, "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news."   The art collector replied, "I've had an aw

Here's one that make me laugh out loud. There's a new handiman at the zoo. He's given 3 jobs for his first day. First, clean the weeds out of the fishpond, for which he's given a shovel. Ste

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While riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head.
 
Dazed and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new convertible pulled up with a very beautiful woman who asked, "Are you okay?
 
As I looked up, I noticed she was wearing a low-cut blouse with a cleavage to die for.
 
"I'm okay I think." I replied as I pulled myself up to the side of the car to get a closer look.
 
She said, "Get in and I'll take you home, so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head."
 
"That's nice of you," I answered, "But I don't think my wife will like me doing that!"
 
"Oh, come now, I'm a nurse," she insisted. "I need to see if you have any more scrapes and then treat them properly."
 
Well, she was really pretty and very persuasive. Being sort of shaken and weak, I agreed, but repeated, "I'm sure my wife won't like this."
 
We arrived at her place which was just few miles away and, after a couple of cold beers and the bandaging, I thanked her and said, "I feel a lot better, but I know my wife is going to be really upset so I'd better go now."
 
Don't be silly!" she said with a smile. "Stay for a while. She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?"
 
"My guess is that she's still in the ditch."
Edited by BigusDicus
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