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A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client and said to him, "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news."   The art collector replied, "I've had an aw

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Ed and his wife Norma go to the state fair every year, and every year Ed would say, "Norma, I'd like to ride in that helicopter." Norma always replied, "I know Ed , but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks!"

One year Ed and Norma went to the fair, and Ed said, "Norma, I'm 75 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance." Norma replied, "Ed, that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks."

The pilot overheard the couple and said, "Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars."

Ed and Norma agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word ... when they landed, the pilot turned to Ed and said, "By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!"

Ed replied, "Well, to tell you the truth I almost said something when Norma fell out, but you know ... fifty bucks is fifty bucks!"

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On 1/22/2022 at 5:54 PM, midlifecrisis said:

3 dead people

I didn't know that Meat Loaf had died and I have no idea who the guy with the glasses is . Betty White I did know died but only knowing the 1 thing The joke ,which I now get , flew right over my head.

 

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5 hours ago, sinbinjack said:

I didn't know that Meat Loaf had died and I have no idea who the guy with the glasses is . Betty White I did know died but only knowing the 1 thing The joke ,which I now get , flew right over my head.

 

Comedian Bob Saget

It's all good.

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1 hour ago, Broughton said:

I love the scream.  And hey, if you are kicking someones ass why put your self within chomping distance.  Did she think the other girl was going to fight fair? 

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A man got on the bus with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.

Finally, after many glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls. The blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said ... finally, unable to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked ... 

"Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"

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