shamasdog

I have a friend from Norway who's health is poor so he's trying to go back to Norway for medical help BUT, he's having problems which I've outlined below. My Norway Friend has very low lung capacity so he has to use oxygen when exerting himself. He's in his early 60s and can walk, but just a short distance. While sitting he rarely need his oxygey. He'll need an airline that will suppliment his portable oxygen bottle. He's been denied by Thai Air. Thai Air says he must have a doctor to fly with him which he can't afford. The Norway Embasse has been no help. Any Advice wo

Just got off the phone with a friend who lives in northern Minnesota. He said it's been snowing since early this morning and the snow was nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window for hours and just stare. He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Thanks for bringing back the fond memories. The panic runs to the crapper. The panic when the gut let out that little eek then the dam burst. Putting a folded town inside my shorts and praying that it would be enough if I accidently farted in my sleep. Never sleeping for fear of farting. I was the first patient of the day, 8am I was on the table in the room. Wearing my nifty gown that is open to the world you have just passed. I get to see the hose that is going to go up Ole Muddy, It's 2 meters long, black and way tooo big around. I taped a standard piece of paper to the c

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. (AP) — Court officials say a Birmingham woman who changed her name to Jesus Christ didn't live up to it when she reported for jury duty this week. The woman, previously named Dorothy Lola Killingworth, was sent to Judge Clyde Jones's courtroom for a criminal case Monday. Court officials told The Birmingham News Tuesday that the 59-year-old was excused because she was disruptive and kept asking questions instead of answering them. Efforts to reach Christ for comment were unsuccessful. Court administrator Sandra Turner said people there were shocked when the woman insis

"When I were a lad, Momma would send me down to t'corner store wi' a dollar, and I'd come back wi' five pounds o' potatoes, two loaves o' bread, three pints o' milk, a pound o' cheese, a packet o' tea, an' 'alf a dozen eggs. Yer can't do that now. Too many damm security cameras." Shamas O'Dognasty Butt Sniffer to the Stars

Bad day at Hallmark Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day......... (they're pretty bad... ) //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat When I looked .... I noticed your cat. Sorry! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret .. She moved in with me. ~~~~~~~~~

Too True, Too Funny, gotta send it to my sisters

BBC reported a source close to the LA Police Investigation as sayings the MJ's skin was as white as writting paper, he was emaciated (sp?) and the vains in both arms were collasped which indicate druge abuse. LOOKING LIKE he wasn't the biological father of his kids. His long time GP Doctor is denying being the doner father. Yep, thats my boy Jacko the Wako. His family can't figure out what to do with the body. Lets see if I can help "Plant the mother fucker in the ground and see what come up, a monkey ass phucking pedeophile freaking white lilly with black roots." ( He used

The determining factor for Serious and Not Serious is who's dick it is. Ask Eddy D and he would tell you it was damn serious.

As for me, I'm leaving her alone (no pun intended). She's just a gal doing the best she can with what she has. Bless her heart for trying so hard Shamas O'dognasty

He was a great entertainer but a frigging freako.

A Soft Taco

On his return he said he cried for 5 days. Reminds me of the girl who complained that a guy had pulled his dick out and showed it to her. When the police asked her "how long" she replied "after 20 minutes I had to leave for my appointment. Back to the GOV, reminds me of Mel Brooks in the scene in Blazing Saddles when he comes out with his half dressed secratary. The Gov cried for 5 our of 7 days. IF he had been soooo upset he could have brought his ass back home. My 2 bhat says they were tears knowing he would have to go home soon. IF he had half a lick of brains h

I got one right, is that a good score

40 years ago we used to have some pretty good parties on a farm. A cardinal sin was to fall asleep Three day weekends constituted a 5 day bash. The blind, cripple and craze were normalized and the normal were never right afterwards. One night C Cat snoozed out, we put burnt paper ash on his face, added lipstick to his lips and rimmed his mouth with it and added mucho eye shadow up to his hair line. We drew tits on the back of his shirt and dick and balls on his pants and a toilet paper streamer out his rea. Mid morning we woke him up and quickly got him in a car, we were all