Monkeywatch - April 2011

[monkeyman 1,604]

Greetings Monkeywatchers, and welcome to this month's surf on the tsunami of Sodom (not forgetting Gomorrah) that we know as Fun City.

 

Well, the Pattaya Music Festival came and went with precious few reports of the gang fights, drunkenness, drug taking, vandalism and all the usual stuff we've come to associate with this happy annual gathering. Don't know what's the matter with people these days. No sense of tradition. Never mind, there's always Songkran.

 

One little side story to emerge was that 300 CCTV cameras were repaired in time for the Music Festival. Makes you wonder how many were actually broken – and how many there actually are. Big Pee Chai is watching you.

 

A 24-hour drug suppression operation was carried out by Banglamung Police last week in an effort to root out all those horrible nasty substances that blight the landscape of Pattaya. A police spokesman said that nine people had been arrested and he was very pleased with the haul of drugs that had been confiscated from the hapless miscreants. He then ran off down the street waving his arms and screaming that he was being chased by a giant spider called Colin.

 

Inspired by the kit car market, a Soi 2 hotel is offering rooms at a discount if you don't mind building them yourself...

 

 

It's been announced that 700 baht buses in Pattaya are to be fitted with "green" brakes in yet another effort to save the planet from doom and destruction. The biggest obstacle to overcome appears to be that the baht bus drivers just don't seem able to grasp the concept. Green they can understand, but brakes?

 

Younger readers might be interested to know that the new Nintendo 3DS hand held game console is now available in Pattaya, though concerns have been expressed in some quarters that it may potentially cause damage to the eyesight. Older readers will no doubt hark back to the days when they were young and there was only one hand held game for them to play - and that wasn't too good for the eyesight either.

 

It looks like the demand for motorised pogo sticks in Pattaya isn't living up to expectations...

 

 

Chonburi is to step up its battle against human trafficking after news reached the local mandarins about a number of organisations that have been indulging in this vile trade. These organisations, known as "airlines", have apparently been transporting vulnerable men from all over the world to Thailand where they have been coerced into indulging in drunkenness, prostitution and boisterous behaviour. Shame on them.

 

A German bloke died last week after falling from his stool in a Naklua bar after consuming a large amount of rum. A member of the bar's staff was later sacked as a result of this incident, presumably for not watering the rum down enough.

 

One of the many new attractions on Beach Road is this live 'hangman' game...

 

 

Bar news now, and yes, Sakura Club 69 has disappeared yet again, but this time in order to be reincarnated as Climax A Go Go. Shark Club has reopened after a refit, and Titty Twister now has a sequel in the form of (you guessed it) Titty Twister 2, which has opened on Third Road next to Buffalo Bar. And for anyone that was aware that First A Go Go had opened, it's closed.

 

Speaking of bars, the gaffer of Kiss A Go Go had his collar felt by the boys in brown the other night for working without a permit when he was caught standing outside his bar. Standing outside bars is of course a very popular career choice for ambitious upwardly mobile Thais, and they don't like farangs coming to their country and taking all the prestige jobs.

 

Finally, there's been a fair bit of comment in recent times about how bar girls are developing a more and more shitty attitude towards good old Johnny punter. Some say this is because of the declining standard of customer, and when you look around at some of the mindless sub-human dregs that are scraping their knuckles round the sois of Pattaya these days, you can't help but think that they may have a point. No wonder the Thais consider themselves to be superior - so do the bloody cockroaches.

 

be seeing you

monkeyman

Edited April 11, 2011 by monkeyman