Jump to content
Displayed prices are for multiple nights. Check the site for price per night. I see hostels starting at 200b/day and hotels from 500b/day on agoda.


  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


monkeyman last won the day on April 26

monkeyman had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

1,544 Excellent

About monkeyman

  • Rank
    Elite Poster

Previous Fields

  • Country
    Cayman Islands

Contact Methods

  • Website URL
  • ICQ

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Location

Recent Profile Visitors

2,855 profile views
  1. Greeting Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for your continued patronage, and welcome to our April fools edition, where the truth may be stretched a little further than normal in one or two places. Or a lot further, as the case may be. Well, Songkran all went fairly smoothly apart from one little incident when a visiting Vietnamese businessman complained to the police that a crowd of revellers just across the road had got his dong all wet. Actually, if he keeps his money in his trousers he might have been making two complaints. The government are demanding that action be taken against
  2. Here's Lou performing in Papagayo...
  3. Well it's certainly possible but I won't be putting my shirt on it. I think this is at least the third opening date we've been given.
  4. And for those who don't remember... How many Pattaya locations can you identify?
  5. Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to another month, and welcome to more tales from the world’s favourite building site. Rock on. A tourist leaving a local beer garden the other week was somewhat surprised to notice that his shorts had unexpectedly caught fire as he left the premises. It seems that a rather careless Thai workman had been cutting through some metal and had sprayed the walkway with a shower of sparks, some of which had ignited the nether garments of the passing tourist. Having been refused compensation by the workman, the hapless tourist went to the police station to m
  6. The 100 or so food stalls obviously didn't. 😡
  7. Greetings Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for staying in touch, and welcome to another sneak peek at the latest goings on (or off as the case may be.) Pattaya police have been issuing leaflets to Chinese tourists warning them of online scams. Suppose they’re on about things like advertising Pattaya as a great place for families where they won’t get shot at by gangs or drowned on ferries. Now who would fall for a scam like that? A beach on Koh Larn has been given a major clean up following a rash of complaints about foul smells, flies and litter. This has outraged the Chinese ambassado
  8. Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to another New Year, and welcome to Monkeywatch as it enters its 19th year, no less. Doesn’t time fly when you’re taking the piss? Thailand is predicted to have lower than normal rainfall this year, so visitors to Pattaya may only find themselves up to their knees in water rather than the usual up to the waist situation. Life just gets better and better. Three people were injured in East Pattaya when a barbecue unexpectedly exploded. Attendees at the function were forced to dive for cover as sausages, burgers and sundry other items were fired a
  9. Top Gun is indeed the old Pulse Club. Champagne and Bachelors still closed as far as I know.
  10. Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to you all, and prepare to be transported to a wonderland of Christmas magic and festive delights. Okay, it’s just the same old shit with tinsel on. Let’s kick off with a rather strange tale. A prisoner went on the run a couple of weeks ago after escaping from Bangkok Pattaya Hospital where he’d been taken for surgery on his penis. A surgeon told police not to bother searching for the man as they’d be able to re-arrest him as soon as he returned to the hospital. When asked how he was so sure the man would return, the surgeon replied “Well we’ve stil
  11. Greetings Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for visiting us once again, and welcome to another session of worm can lid lifting. Tin openers at the ready. So December 15 is the big day when we finally get the near mythical official 4am bar closing times. So this puts us back exactly where we were about 20 plus years ago when many of us were visiting Pattaya for the very first time. Isn’t progress wonderful? Interestingly, it’s been pointed out that the new closing time regulations don’t extend the hours during which alcohol can be served, so you’ll need to buy a shitload of beer before 2am to
  12. Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap encore une fois, and welcome to our autumn almanac of stories you couldn’t make up. Well not entirely anyway. A tourist in Thailand turned up at a local airport the other week asking for help as he couldn’t remember which hotel he was staying at. The staff duly made enquiries and told him “Well, we’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that we’ve found out that you’re booked in at The Hilton. The bad news is that it’s the Amsterdam Hilton. There’s a bus stop at the end of the road.” The Department of Marine and coastal Res
  13. Maybe we have a woke tourist in our midst?
  14. Greetings Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for coming back for more, and welcome to some more dollops of dirt served up on a Pattaya platter. Engage warped drive. Let’s begin with some good news. It’s been reported that Chinese visitor numbers to Pattaya are declining. Various reasons have been put forward to explain this, such as higher air fares and visa complications, but no mention was made of things like Chinese drowning on sinking ferries, being shot dead in the crossfire between feuding Thai gangs and plummeting to their death from various high-placed locations. Must have slipped the
  15. Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to another month, and welcome to more midsummer mayhem in Loony Land. On with the show. Well, we’ve said goodbye to the old Walking Street and hello to the new sign-free and cable-free version. Don’t worry though – if you feel a bit nostalgic, just wander up any of the side sois and see things exactly as they were before. Vehicles have been banned from Bali Hai pier following the discovery of structural damage to its supports. Probably due to the weight of all those Chinese tourists standing on it. Either that or they’ve been eating it. Anyon
  • Create New...