havefunme

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. W. C. Fields “I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.” W. C. Fields “I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.” Fields gave this rationale for not drinking water: Fish f*ck in it. found off of 4 sites all same to me besides it was a paraphrase not a quote

A good glass of wine To paraphrase W.C. Fields, "I don't drink water, because fish screw in it." To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine.... and those who don't...As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, In beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.. However, we do NOT run that risk whe

Now that was funny I hope it doesn't give Villa any ideas

How was the internet or do they have internet in Citin loft ( in rooms ) ? I stayed at Citin loft in Hua Hin 2 weeks ago internet was very slow

Ladyboys are on the left arm

A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bath- room. >>She said yes. >>When he went to wipe his fanny there was no toilet paper so, he used >>his hand. >>When he got back to class, his teacher asked, "What do you have in >>your hand?" >>The boy said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get >>scared away." >>He was then sent to the principal's office and the principal asked >>him, "What do you have in your hand?" >> >>The little boy said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands >>h

Very important information has just been made public that I think is something you should all be aware of: Gonorrhea Lectim. The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of this old disease. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim. It's pronounced "Gonna re-elect 'im." The disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior involving putting your cranium up your rectum. Many victims contracted it in 2008 ..... but now most people after having been infected for the past 1-2 years are starting to realize how destructive this sickness i

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. 2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes. 3. You have more wives than teeth. 4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean." 5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. 6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. 7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing. 8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than settin

The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, 'Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, Which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable.' I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,' says Grandpa. 'How about a demonstration?' The auditor thinks for a moment and said, 'Okay. Go ahead.' Grandpa says, 'I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.'

One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, he didn't buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started... ------------------------------------------------ I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary? ' It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!'she said. So I suggested,'How about the kitchen?' And that's when the fight started...

Bottle of Merlot A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant. So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman who is seated over there,' and indicated the sender with a nod of his head. She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman. The note read: 'For me to accept this bottle, you

What no beer in other hand

Ed are you going to hire a LB for villa

in town 10th feb

Ed just want to see you miss you to much

THINGS I DID TO DESERVE THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE by Barack Obama ____________________________________________ OTHER BLACK PEOPLE I'VE MET WHILE YACHTING by Tiger Woods ______________________________________________ THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY COUNTRY by Jane Fonda & Cindy Sheehan. Illustrated by Michael Moore ________________________________________ MY CHRISTIAN ACCOMPLISHMENTS & HOW I HELPED AFTER KATRINA by Rev Jesse Jackson & Rev Al Sharpton _______________________________________ THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by Hi

322.9 but i like it when it does a nose dive in the snow

Paul and Mary get married but couldn't afford a honeymoon - so they go back to Paul's Mom and Dad's house for their first night together. In the morning Johnny - Paul's little brother - gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school - he asks his mom if Paul and Mary are up yet. She replies - No. Johnny asks - Do you know what I think ? His mom replies - I don't want to hear what you think ! Just go to school. Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom - Are Paul and Mary up yet ? She replies - No.. Johnny says - Do you k

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN Between 18 and 22 a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful! Between 23 and 30 a woman is like Europe, well-developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value. Between 31 and 35 a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty. Between 36 and 40 a woman is like Greece, gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit. Between 41 and 50 a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and all conquering past. Between 51 and 60 a woma

IT MUST HAVE BEEN A VERY BRAVE MAN WHO WROTE THIS! IT'S AN EVEN BRAVER ONE WHO FORWARDS IT .... Son asked his mother the following question: 'Mum, why are wedding dresses white?' The mother looks at her son and replies, 'Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure.' The son thanks his Mum and goes off to double-check this with his father. 'Dad why are wedding dresses white?' The father looks at his son in surprise and says: 'Son, all household appliances come in white.'

A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, “The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.” The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does. She replies, “The bigger they are, the dumber the man is.” Again satisfied with her answer, the boy goes back to the ocean to play. Shortly ther

Last night, my sons and I were sitting in the living room and I said to them , 'I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.' They got up, unplugged the Computer, and threw out my rum and coke. Children They’re such asses ...

I always thought villa's bathroom looked like this untitled.bmp