SOLOTREKKER

Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2008 Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 6 Some people are like a Slinky ....Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. Number 5 Hea

Thanks it gave me a laugh.

1. A nursery school pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. 'How do you know that the cat was dead?' she asked her pupil. 'Because I p!$$£d in its ear and it didn't move,' answered the child innocently. 'You did WHAT?' the teacher exclaimed in surprise. 'You know,' explained the boy, 'I leaned over and went 'Pssst' and it didn't move' 2. A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later.....'Da-ad....' 'What?' 'I'm thirsty. Can you bring a drink of water?' 'No, You had your chance. Lights out.' Five minutes later: 'Da-aaaad.....' 'WHA

There were three Eskimos, and one time while they were at their local bar, they got to talking about how cold it was outside, and how cold their igloos were. They could agree on everything but whose igloo was the coldest, so they decided to determine who, indeed, had the coldest igloo. They went to the first Eskimo's igloo, where he said "Watch this!" he poured a cup of water into the air. Well, the water froze in mid-air and fell onto the floor solid. "Not bad" said the other Eskimos, but each maintained their igloo was colder still. So they went to the second Eskimo's igloo, and he sa

ITS A PUPPET, NO REALLY ITS A PUPPET

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your ass and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference. If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive. If you

A.. Save the whales. Collect the whole set. A.. A day without sunshine is like..... night. A.. On the other hand, you have different fingers. A.. I just got lost in thought. It wasn't familiar territory. A.. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. A.. Over 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. A.. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. A.. Honk if you love peace and quiet. A.. Remember, half the people you know are below average. A.. He who laughs last.... thinks slowest. A.. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse

http://youtube.com/watch?v=ES_Wn2XJTdM&feature=related

1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones. 2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying. 3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger. 4) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly. 5) You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire in your back garden. 6) Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl. 7) You never know where to look when eating a banana. 8) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses. 9) The smal

http://www.biertijd.com/mediaplayer/flvpla...rue&fs=true

New Words for 2008 * SALAD DODGER. An excellent phrase for an overweight person. * SWAMP-DONKEY A deeply unattractive person. * TESTICULATING. Waving your arms around and talking bollocks. * BLAMESTORMING. Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. * SEAGULL MANAGER. A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and Then leaves. * ASSMOSIS. The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard. * SA

SANTA'S STRESS When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mum was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. S

Check out this driver in a supermarket. The trailer is only one of the 'short' 33' type too.

Nice to see and hear from you back on the board SK, Hope you are feeling better now, at least you look like your felling better. Be a good girl now!!.

When in Patts, I have eaten from the street stalls, I only eat Thai food when in Patts, the one ocaission I ate a 'western' meal, was in the Lobster Pot in WS some years ago, I had a dose of the toilet 2 step, ( never be more than 2 steps from a toilet), I never had any problems with local Thai food at all!, But then The TGs I was with chose all the places where we ate. You can buy Immodium from Boots in Pattaya if you need it. If you find that you have the desire to leave Patts, there is more touristy things to do than you will have time for, and Patts has quite a few travel shops aroun