tom21

State high temperature records State Temp Date Station Elevation (feet) Ala. 112 Sept. 5, 1925 Centerville 345 Alaska 100 June 27, 1915 Ft. Yukon 420* Ariz. 128 June 29, 1994 Lake Havasu 505 Ark. 120 Aug. 10, 1936 Ozark 396 Calif. 134 July 10, 1913 Death Valley N/A Colo. 118 July 11, 1888 Bennett 5,484 Conn. 106 July 15, 1995 Danbury 450 Del. 110 July 21, 1930 Millsboro 20 Fla. 109 June 29, 1931 Monticello 207 Ga. 112 July 24, 1952 Louisville 132 Hawaii 100 April 27,1931 Pahala 850 Idaho 118 July 28, 1934 Orofino 1,027 Ill. 117 July 14, 1954 E. St Louis 410 Ind. 116 July 14, 1936 Collegeville 672 Iowa 118 July 20, 1934 Keokuk 614 Kansas 121 July 24, 1936 Alton 1,651 Ky. 114 July 28, 1930 Greensburg 581 La. 114 Aug. 10, 1936 Plain Dealing 268 Maine 105 July 10, 1911 N. Bridgton 450 Md. 109 July 10, 1936 Cumberland and Frederick 623, 325 Mass. 107 Aug. 2, 1975 New Bedford and Chester 120, 640 Mich. 112 July 13, 1936 Mio 963 Minn. 114 July 6, 1936 Moorhead 904 Miss. 115 July 29, 1930 Holly Springs 600 Mo 118 July 14, 1954 Warsaw and Union 705, 560 Mont. 117 July 5, 1937 Medicine Lake 1,950 Neb. 118 July 24, 1936 Minden 2,169 Nev. 125 June 29, 1994 Laughlin 605 N.H. 106 July 4, 1911 Nashua 125 N.J. 110 July 10, 1936 Runyon 18 N.M. 122 June 27, 1994 Lakewood N/A N.Y. 108 July 22, 1926 Troy 35 N.C. 110 Aug. 21, 1983 Fayetteville 213 N.D. 121 July 6, 1936 Steele 1,857 Ohio 113 July 21, 1934 Gallipolis 673 Okla. 120 June 27, 1994 Tipton 1,350 Ore. 119 Aug. 10, 1898 Pendleton 1,074 Pa. 111 July 10, 1936 Phoenixville 100 R.I. 104 Aug. 2, 1975 Providence 51 S.C. 111 June 28, 1954 Camden 170 S.D. 120 July 15, 2006 Kelly Ranch/Usta 2,339 Tenn. 113 Aug. 9, 1930 Perryville 377 Texas 120 Aug. 12, 1936 Seymour 1,291 Utah 117 July 5, 1985 Saint George 2,880 Vt. 105 July 4, 1911 Vernon 310 Va. 110 July 15, 1954 Balcony Falls 725 Wash. 118 Aug. 5, 1961 Ice Harbor Dam 475 475 W. Va. 112 July 10, 1936 Martinsburg 435 Wis. 114 July 13, 1936 Wisconsin Dells 900 Wyo. 116 Aug. 8, 1983 Basin 3,500 *Elevation big difference between low an high

State by state low temperature records State Temp. Date Station Elevation ( F) (feet) Alabama -27 Jan. 30, 1966 New Market 760 Alaska -80 Jan. 23, 1971 Prospect Creek 1,100 Arizona -40 Jan. 7, 1971 Hawley Lake 8,180 Arkansas -29 Feb. 13, 1905 Pond 1,250 California -45 Jan. 20, 1937 Boca 5,532 Colorado -61 Feb. 1, 1985 Maybell 5,920 Connecticut -32 Feb. 16, 1943 Falls Village 585 Delaware -17 Jan. 17, 1893 Millsboro 20 Florida - 2 Feb. 13, 1899 Tallahassee 193 Georgia -17 Jan. 27, 1940 N. Floyd County 1,000 Hawaii 12 May 17, 1979 Mauna Kea 13,770 Idaho -60 Jan. 18, 1943 Island Park Dam 6,285 Illinois -36 Jan. 5, 1999 Congerville 722 Indiana -36 Jan. 19, 1994 New Whiteland 785 Iowa -47 Feb. 3, 1996* Elkader 770 Kansas -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Lebanon 1,812 Kentucky -37 Jan. 19, 1994 Shelbyville 730 Louisiana -16 Feb. 13, 1899 Minden 194 Maine -48 Jan. 19, 1925 Van Buren 458 Maryland -40 Jan. 13, 1912 Oakland 2,461 Massachusetts -35 Jan. 12, 1981 Chester 640 Michigan -51 Feb. 9, 1934 Vanderbilt 785 Minnesota -60 Feb. 2, 1996 Tower 1,430 Mississippi -19 Jan. 30, 1966 Corinth 420 Missouri -40 Feb. 13, 1905 Warsaw 700 Montana -70 Jan. 20, 1954 Rogers Pass 5,470 Nebraska -47 Feb. 12, 1899 Camp Clarke 3,700 Nevada -50 Jan. 8, 1937 San Jacinto 5,200 New Hampshire -47 Jan. 29, 1934 Mt. Washington 6,288 New Jersey -34 Jan. 5, 1904 River Vale 70 New Mexico -50 Feb. 1, 1951 Gavilan 7,350 New York -52 Feb. 18, 1979* Old Forge 1,720 North Carolina -34 Jan. 21, 1985 Mt. Mitchell 6,525 North Dakota -60 Feb. 15, 1936 Parshall 1,929 Ohio -39 Feb. 10, 1899 Milligan 800 Oklahoma -27 Jan. 18, 1930 Watts 958 Oregon -54 Feb. 10, 1933* Seneca 4,700 Pennsylvania -42 Jan. 5, 1904 Smethport est. 1,500 Rhode Island -25 Feb. 5, 1996 Greene 425 South Carolina -19 Jan. 21, 1985 Caesars Head 3,100 South Dakota -58 Feb. 17, 1936 McIntosh 2,277 Tennessee -32 Dec. 30, 1917 Mountain City 2,471 Texas -23 Feb. 8, 1933* Seminole 3,275 Utah -69 Feb. 1, 1985 Peter's Sink 8,092 Vermont -50 Dec. 30, 1933 Bloomfield 915 Virginia -30 Jan. 22, 1985 Mountain Lake 3,870 Washington -48 Dec. 30, 1968 Mazama 2,120 Winthrop 1,755 West Virginia -37 Dec. 30, 1917 Lewisburg 2,200 Wisconsin -55 Feb.4, 1996 Couderay 1,300 Wyoming -66 Feb. 9, 1933 Riverside 6,650

The Taxidermists Holiday A bloke walks into a bar in New Zealand and orders a shandy. All the Kiwis sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see another Australian visitor. The barman says, "You ain't from around here, are ya?" The guy says, "No, I'm from Canada." The bartender says, "What do you do in Canada?" The guy says, "I'm a taxidermist." The bartender says, "A tixidermist? What the hick is a tixidermist? Do you drive a tixi?" "No, a taxidermist doesn't drive a taxi. I mount animals." The bartender grins and yells, "He's okay boys. He's one of us."

COURT TRIAL Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age? Little Old Lady: I am 86 years old. Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me. Defense Attorney: Did you know him? Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly. Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down? Little Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh. Defense Attorney: Did you stop him? Little Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him. Defense Attorney: Why not? Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago. Defense Attorney: What happened next? Little Old Lady: He began to rub my breasts. Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then? Little Old Lady: No, I did not stop him. Defense Attorney: Why not? Little Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years! Defense Attorney: What happened next? Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him "Take me, young man. Take me now!" Defense Attorney: Did he take you? Little Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.

Michael Jackson and the doctor are walking out of the delivery room after his wife gives birth to their son. Michael says, "How long before we can have sex?" The doctor says, "At least wait until he's walking."

Don't forget to read the editors note at the end! It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to shout at them. Some are over-sensitive and there's nothing worse than an over-sensitive woman. My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Julie. When I took early retirement last year, it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job for the extra income that we need. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I now usually get home from the pub about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she nearly always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't shout at her, instead I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch at the pub so eating out again is out of the question; I'm ready for some home cooked food when I get home. She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's usual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed. Another symptom of ageing is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to do the shopping during her lunch hour. But we take them for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then won't hurt her. I like to think tact is one of my strong points. When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She has to take a rest when she has only half finished mowing the lawn and several extra breaks when she's vacuuming through the house. It does annoy me, vacuuming when I'm trying to watch 'Match of the Day', but I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to make herself a nice cup of tea and just sit for a while, and as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too. I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your ageing wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other, eh? Ron EDITOR'S NOTE: Ron died suddenly last week. He was found with a 24-inch Stanley screwdriver rammed up his a*** with only 2 inches showing. His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-woman jury accepted her defence that he accidentally sat on it.

Only great minds can read this This is weird, but interesting! fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it FORWARD ONLY IF YOU CAN READ IT. (i am worried as i can read it, but then my normal spelling is not much better)

the main problem is about 45 years. a 15 year old should be able to do it in their head. may have trouble explaining why a object could stop on a frictionless surface. it should of said how high it went up before it started to fall.

DepartmentofHealthAustralia1.docreceived this today

good joke bet some people believe it.

Work on the principle that the practice accounts are real so if you are making a profit on a regular basis go for it. It is not as easy as it looks so do not play with what you can not afford to loose. As the account will not be in Thailand I can not see a problem with it.

A guy walked into the local welfare office, marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd reallyrather have a job." The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter you'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, and he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips and you will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The salary is $200,000 a year." The guy, wide-eyed, said, "You're bullshitting me!" The social worker said, "Yeah, well . . you started it."

No matter what this husband did in bed, his wife never achieved an orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to consult their Rabbi. The Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion: "Hire a strapping young man. While the two of you are making love have the young man wave a towel over you. That will help the wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm." They go home and follow the Rabbi's advice. They hire a handsome young man and he waves a towel over them as they make love. It doesn't help and he wife is still unsatisfied. Perplexed, they go back to the Rabbi. "Okay," he says to the husband, try it reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife and you wave the towel over them." Once again, they follow the Rabbi's advice. They go home and hire the same strapping young man. The young man gets into bed with the wife and the husband waves the towel. The young man gets to work withgreat enthusiasm and the wife soon has an enormous, room-shaking, screaming orgasm. The husband smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly: "You see, you young schmuck? THAT'S how you wave a towel"

that is a very interesting thread.

YES IT'S TRUE. THE NEW STAND AT THE SYDNEY CRICKET GROUND IS TO BE NAMED IN HONOUR OF SHANE WARNE IT IS TO BE CALLED THE ONE NIGHT STAND

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions: Have you any grounds? Yes, an acre and half and nice little home. No, I mean what is the foundation of this case? It made of concrete. I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge? No, we have carport, and not need one. I mean. What are your relations like? All my relations still in Poland. Is there any infidelity in your marriage? We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player. Does your wife beat you up? No, I always up before her. Is your wife a nagger? No, she white. Why do you want this divorce? She is going to kill me. What makes you think that? I got proof. What kind of proof? She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say: "Polish Remover."

i thought this one was funny

Maxine took her car to her mechanic. She told him "Every time I take any of my friends out in my car, after a while there is this terrible smell !! . It never happens when I am on my own" This quite intrigued the mechanic so he said, "OK, lets go for a spin and see what the problem is". Off they went. She drove down a one-way street in the wrong direction at 70 MPH, swerving, hitting the curb on both sides of the street, narrowly missed three pedestrians in pedestrian crossings, ran several red lights, and just missed a policeman on street traffic duty. They returned to the shop and she said, "There it is now, there's that terrible smell. Can you smell it?" "Smell it? Lady, I'm sittin' in it !! *************************************************

Subject: FW: Two Nuns Two nuns, Sister Catherine and Sister Helen, are travelling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouts Sister Catherine. "What shall we do?" "Turn the windshield wipers on. That will get rid of the abomination, "says Sister Helen. Sister Catherine switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "What shall I do now?" she shouts. "Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water at the Vatican," says Sister Helen. Sister Catherine turns on the windshield washer. Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "Now what?" shouts Sister Catherine. "Show him your cross," says Sister Helen. "Now you're talking," says Sister Catherine. She opens the window and shouts, "Get the f**k off my car!"

Mexican Jews Two Jewish men, Abe and Al, were sitting in a Mexican restaurant. Abe asked Al, "Are there any people of our faith born and raised in Mexico? Al replied, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter." When the waiter came by, Al asked him, "Are there any Mexican Jews?" the waiter said, "I don't know Senor, I'll ask the cooks. He returned from the kitchen in a few minutes and said "No sir, no Mexican Jews." Al wasn't really satisfied with that and asked, "Are you absolutely sure? The waiter, realizing he was dealing with "Gringos" gave the expected answer, "I will check again, Senor!" and went back into the kitchen. While the waiter was away, Abe said, "I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico, Our people are scattered everywhere." The waiter returned and said "Senor, the head cook said there is no Mexican Jews" Al asked once again "I can't believe there are no Mexican Jews!" "Senor, I ask EVERYONE," replied the exasperated waiter, "All we have is Orange Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews, and Grape Jews."

Remember, I don't write 'em, just post them on. Two Muslim mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping through photos and they start reminiscing. "This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old now." "Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully. "He's a martyr now though!" mum confides. "Oh, so sad dear," says the other. "And this is my second son Khalid. He's 21." "Oh, I remember him," says the other happily. "He had such curly hair when he was born." "He's a martyr, too!!" says mum quietly. "Oh gracious me," says the other. "And this is my third son, my baby, my beautiful Ahmed. He's 18," she whispers. "Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school." "He is a martyr, also!!!" says mum, with tears in her eyes. After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says. "They blow up so fast, don't they?" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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they are right ,the visa is granted by the immigration officer at point of entry and it is up to you to check. after reading your post i know i will as by your post it is both costly in both time and money. thanks for letting us know

Artificial Insemination Amy, a blond Texas girl from the city, marries a Texas rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The artificial insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the two-by-four just above the cow's stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is when he gets here, okay?" The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along a long row of cows and when she sees the nail, she tells him, "This is the one . . right here." Terribly impressed by what he assumed was just another ditzy blond, the man asks, "How did you know this is the cow to be bred?" "That's simple -- by the nail over its stall," Amy explains. Then the man asks, "What's the nail for?" As she walks away, she turns her head back over her shoulder & says to the man . "I guess it's to hang your pants on."

BILLY'S G@Y DANCER DAD Billy was at school this morning and the teacher asked all the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came out, fireman, policeman, salesman, chippy, captain of industry etc, but Billy was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father. "My father is an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really good, he'll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them sleep with him." The teacher quickly set the other children some work and took little Billy aside to ask him if that was really true. "No" said Billy, "He plays cricket for England but I was just too embarrassed to say."