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Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of

their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called

out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn

up."

 

"Sure," they said. "You're welcome.'"

 

So the three of them started playing and the two old friends

enjoyed the round of golf and the company of the newcomer.

 

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the

newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

 

"I'm a hit man," was the matter-of-fact reply.

 

"You're joking!" the old friends replied, nearly in unison.

 

"No, I'm not," he said, and he reached into his golf bag and

pulled out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large

telescopic sight. "Here are my tools."

 

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said one of the old

friends. "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my

house from here." He picked up the rifle and looked thro ugh the

sight in the direction of his house.

 

"Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic! I

can see right in the window. Wow, I can see my wife in the

bedroom. Ha! I can see she's naked!! Wait a minute. That's my

neighbor in there with her...... He's naked, too!!!"

 

He turned to the hit man. "How much do you charge for a hit?'

 

"I'll charge a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every

time I pull the trigger."

 

"Can you do two for me now?"

 

"Sure. What do you want?"

 

"First, shoot my wife. She's always been mouthy, so shoot her in

the mouth.

Then the neighbor. He has been a long-time friend of mine, so

just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson."

 

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly

still for a few minutes.

 

"Are you going to do it or not?" demanded the friend

impatiently.

 

"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly. "I think I can sav e

you a grand here."

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