Careful in Vegas

[BigusDicus]

THE WEALTHY HOOKER-

 

A guy is walking the strip in Las Vegas

and a fantastic-looking Vegas hooker catches his eye.

 

 

He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the

hooker, "How much do you charge?"

 

 

The Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."

 

 

The guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Holy crap!

 

No hand-job is worth that kind of money!"

 

 

The hooker says, "Do you see that Denny's on the corner?"

 

 

 

"Yes."

 

 

"Do you see the Denny's about a block further down?"

 

 

 

"Yes."

 

 

"And beyond that, do you see that third Denny's?"

 

"Yes."

 

 

 

"Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those.

 

And I own them because I give a hand-job that's

worth $500."

 

 

 

So the guy says, "What the hell? You only live once. I'll

give it a try."

 

 

 

They retire to a nearby motel. A

short time later, the guy is sitting

 

on the bed realizing that he has just experienced

the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500.

 

 

He is so amazed, he says, "I suppose a blow-job is

$1,000?"

 

 

 

The hooker replies, "$1,500."

 

 

 

"I wouldn't pay that for a blow-job!"

 

 

 

The hooker replies, "Step over here to the

window, big boy. Do you see

that casino just across the street? I own that

casino outright. And I

own it because I give a blow-job that's worth

every cent of $1,500."

 

 

 

The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific hand-job,

decides to put off the new car for another year or so and

says, "Sign me up."

 

 

 

Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more

amazed than before.

 

 

 

He can scarcely believe it but he feels he truly

got his money's worth.

 

 

 

He decides to dip into the retirement savings for

one glorious and unforgettable experience.

 

 

 

He asks the hooker, "How much for some pussy?"

 

 

 

The hooker says, "Come over here to the

window, I want to show you something.

 

 

 

Do you see how the whole city of Las Vegas is laid

out before us: All those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and shows?

 

 

 

"Damn!" the guy says, in awe, "You

own the whole city?"

 

 

 

No," the hooker replies,

 

 

"but I would... if I had a pussy."