george bush's choice in hell

[adil799 0]

The President of the United States of America, George W. Bush had a

 

heart attack and died.

 

He went to hell where the devil was waiting for him. "I don't know

 

what to do here," says the devil.

 

"You're on my list but I have no room for you, but you definitely

 

have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do.

 

I've got 3 people here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one

 

of them go, but you have to take

 

their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."

 

George thought that sounded pretty good, so he agreed.

 

 

The devil opened the first room. In it was former President Richard

 

Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing

 

gasping for air, then immediately diving back into the water again

over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell.

 

"No!" George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I

 

don't think I could do that all day long."

 

 

 

The devil let him to the next room. In it was British Prime

 

Minister Tony Blair with a sledgehammer

 

and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time

 

after time after time.

 

 

 

"No way, I've got this problem with my shoulder. It would be

 

constant agony if all I could do was break

rocks all day!" commented George.

 

 

The devil opened a third door. In it, George saw former President

 

Bill Clinton lying naked on the floor

 

with his arms staked over his head and his legs in a spread eagle

 

pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.

 

 

 

George Bush looked at this in disbelief for awhile and finally said,

 

"Yeah I could handle this."

 

 

The devil smiled and said . . . "Monica, you're free to go!"

[elef 0]

Maybe it will be heaven instead:

 

George W. Bush, Albert Einstein and Pablo Picasso have all died. Due to a glitch in the mundane/celestial time-space continuum, all three arrive at the Pearly Gates more or less simultaneously, even though their deaths have taken place decades apart. The first to present himself to Saint Peter is Einstein. Saint Peter questions him. "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths certain people will go to, to sneak into Heaven under false pretenses. Can you prove who you really are?" Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?" Saint Peter complies with a snap of his fingers. The blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his special theory of relativity. Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really are Einstein! Welcome to heaven! The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again Saint Peter asks for his credentials. Picasso doesn't hesitate. "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead." Picasso erases Einstein's scribbles and proceeds to sketch out a truly stunning mural. Bulls, satyrs, nude women: he captures their essences with but a few strokes of the chalk. Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be! Come on in!" The last to arrive is George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head. "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?" George W. looks bewildered, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?" Saint Peter sighs, "Come on in, George."