The tooth, the whole tooth

[joekicker 53]

I'm on a mailing list that sometimes dishes up the scripts of the late-night show monologues in the US. Americans, skip the next paragraph.

 

For those who don't know, every weekday night about 10 or 11 o'clock in the US, all the big networks and a couple of small ones have "late night shows" which are essentially variety shows, with interviews of stars and wannabes. Some of them get a pretty big audience. They go on until 2, 3 even 4 o'clock in the morning.

 

Inevitably they start with a jokey monologue by the show's host. Here are what Americans got on Monday night, according to my email:

 

If you don’t know "Downtown Abbey," it's a British soap opera that's getting very popular. It's like an American soap opera, but without all those straight teeth.

- Craig Ferguson

 

The body that was found on Queen Elizabeth's estate in England has been identified, finally. See, it takes a lot longer to identify bodies in England, because as you know, there are no dental records.

- Jay Leno

 

The British government has urged its citizens to abstain from alcohol at least two days a week. Or to make it easier to remember, whenever they brush their teeth.

- Conan O'Brien (who is Irish)

 

.

[kaiser71 30]

Let me guess. Red's your favorite color?

[jacko 8,775]

Aha another opportunity to bad mouth the Brits and make it look like someone else is responsible.