Teilo

Returning to LOS after a 5 year hiatus..... Thai Heathrow to Bangkok return Nov - Dec £500 !!!!....done deal...was sorting through my docs from last trip Aug 2010...Thai Heathrow to Bangkok return £802....Bonus you get to book seats on booking now not 24 hours before departure..... on the load out diagram, there is a single seat between the central 4 seats and the window seats...those the seats I booked there and back :) :).....3 months 12 days until paradise !!!!!!!!! Plus its the New A380 !!!....:) :) :)

I've just booked Taxi with mr Toom I'm arriving from UK about 15-00 hrs.... Eva Air if anyone wants to share taxi send me a PM

On the strength of all the positive things I have read about Mr Tooms Taxi service, I e-mailed him with my arrival date and time.. Within 2 hours Mr Toom had replied confirming booking. I will e-mail him again just prior to flight day...just to re-confirm..I sure that I don't need to.. But I live in a world were you can't even be sure that a taxi you book the night before will, actually arrive. will let you know how it goes...but not anticipating any probs

Q: What's pink and hard? A: A pig with a flick knife. Q: Why do blondes have more fun? A: They are easier to keep amused. Q: Why do seagulls have wings? A: To beat the gypsies to the tip. Q: Why did god invent alcohol? A: So fat women can get laid too. Q. How do you get three little old ladies to say the "F" word? A. Have a fourth one yell "Bingo!" Q: What do you get if you cross a pit bull with a hooker? A: Your last blow job. Q: Why did god create women? A: Because dogs can't get beer out the fridge. Q: What's 100 yards long and smells of piss? A: The Post Office queue on Thursday mornings. Q: What's the difference between a woman from Wigan and a walrus? A: One's got a moustache and smells of fish and the other lives in the sea. Q: How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, but it takes 15 to write a paper entitled "coping with darkness" Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A: It scares the shit out of the dog. Q: What have women and condoms got in common? A: If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet. Q: What's the difference between PMT and BSE? A: One's mad cow's disease and the other's an agricultural problem. Q: Why was the washing machine laughing? A: Because it was taking the piss out of the undies. Q: What will Postman Pat be called when he retires? A: Pat Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog. Q: What's got four legs, and goes "Woof"? A: Piper Alpha. Q: How do you make a dog drink? A: Put it in a liquidizer. Q: What's got 500 legs and no pubic hair? A: The front row at a Boyzone concert. Q: What's got four legs and an arm? A: A Rottweiler. Q: What's got two legs and bleeds? A: Half a dog.. Q: What do you do if your boiler explodes? A: Buy her some flowers. Q: What is the definition of confusion? A: Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market. Q. What do you call a man who expects to have sex on the second date? A: Patient..!!

Pfizer have also announced that they have formulated Viagra for use by Women they going to call it...... Niagra

wow that was some fish !!!

ROFL

Some short and sweet, fast and furious one liners... hope you enjoy Q whats the definition of making love ? A its what a Woman does when a Mans Fucking her Q why do scotsmen wear kilts ? A Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away Q whats a mans idea of foreplay ? A 1 hour of begging Q what do you call a Lesbian with thick fingers ? A Well hung Q what do you call a scouser in a white shell suit ? A The Bride Q what do you get if you cross an agnostic, an insomniac, and a dyslexic ? A A man who lies awake at night, wondering if there really is a dog Q what's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer ? A The taste Q whats the best way to remember your wife's birthday ? A Forget it once Q What's the difference between Twiggy and a fake American dollar ? A One's a phoney buck.... Q Why do men give names to their dicks ? A Becauce they don't want a total stranger making 90% of their decisions Q What do you call an Australian with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other ? A Bisexual Q what do you call an Aardvark that's just been beaten up ? A A Vark Q why can't you have driving lessons and receive sex education on the same day in Iraq ? A it wears out the camel Did you hear, Stevie Wonder got a cheese grater for his bithday. He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read Q What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Cardiff ? A A leisure centre Q whats the definition of trust ? A 2 Gay cannibals going down on each other Q what do christmas trees and catholic priests have in common ? A their balls are just for decoration A New Zealand farmer takes his driving test... " can you make a U-turn ? " asks the instuctor " you betcha" the farmer replies " I can make its fucking eyes water " Q whats 6 inches long ... and gets a BG excited ? A A £50 note Q why do Farts smell ? A so the deaf can enjoy Q Whats the difference between a british and an Iraqi soldier ? Don't know ? A Welcome to the United States Air Force! Q how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb ? A 2..but how do they get in ? Q What do you call a camel with 4 humps ? A A Saudi Quattro Q why did the pervert cross the road ? A He couldn't get his dick out the chicken Q why don't worms have balls ? A because they can't dance Q how do you castrate a catholic priest ? A Kick the alter boy in the back of the head Q what's the worst thing about being a test-tube baby ? A You KNOW your dad's a wanker Q why did the woman cross the road ? A Never mind that...whats she doing out the Kitchen ? Q where would you find a duck with no legs ? A Where you left it Q How can you tell if its your turn to do the washing up ? A Look down..if you got a dick, its not your turn Q what do men with 2 left feet wear to the beach ? A flip-flips Q what do 1 legged men wear to the beach ? A flips Q what do you call an Irish Lesbian ? A Gaelic And finally.... Q what do Americans use as contraception ? A their personalities