MONKEYWATCH - July 2008

[monkeyman]

Greeting Monkeywatchers, and welcome to this month’s look at the city where the sun of a beach is always waiting for you.

 

We begin with a strange tale concerning the arrest in Pattaya Market last weekend of three men for impersonating monks. Well actually they really were monks, or at least they had been monks until three days before when they were defrocked and became ex-monks, so when they were arrested they weren’t monks anymore so they were in fact charged with pretending to be the monks they’d previously been. Well, that’s that cleared up then.

 

The Ruskies have announced that they’re to ban foreign toys and Valentine’s Day in order to protect their youth from moral corruption by the West. They’re presumably not bothered about the East, judging by the fact that Pattaya is overrun with the little buggers at the moment. The official statement proclaims, “The essence of freedom is that there should be moral restrictions - that is what freedom is”. Sounds like their dictionaries are about as good as their cars.

 

Many visitors to Pattaya have devised cunning plans to preserve their anonymity. This resourceful chappie, for instance, has cleverly disguised himself as a chimney to avoid detection…

 

 

If you’re looking for some cheap furniture, the newly opened Thanakorn Furniture Shop in Jomtien is offering discounts of up to 50 per cent on a variety of items for both home and business. Just the ticket for all you Cheap Chair-lies out there.

 

Bar news includes Rock Girls A Go Go closing then reopening as Smile A Go Go, and the old Mistys A Go Go on Soi Pattayaland 2 rising like a phoenix from the ashes to become Legs Club A Go Go. Surprisingly, the latter will still feature girls, even though they’re now officially listed as an endangered species in the area.

 

On the music scene, it’s been rumoured that Lam Morrison is to return to The Blues Factory shortly, having left the rock bar that bears his name. In another momentous move, the FLB Bar has finally succumbed and got a new house band who are neither ugly nor brothers. They aren’t bad and they’re not too loud either, so if you don’t want your ears syringed by Lam Morrison and the like, they may be right up your street – as long as it happens to be Walking Street. Or if you’re a blues freak and happen to be in Bangkok on a Friday or Saturday evening, you could do worse than visiting Tokyo Joe’s on Sukhumvit Soi 26 and having a listen to the Soi Dog Blues Band. Nice.

 

Preparations are well underway for the Pattaya Amateur Dramatic Society’s ambitious production of ‘Lawrence Of Arabia’…

 

 

You’ll doubtless be excited to hear that the Eighth Futsal Competition is taking place between June 28 and July 27 in Mike Shopping Mall, so get yourself a futsal, give it a polish and get it down there pronto for a chance to win 10,000 baht. No, we don’t know what the futsal they’re on about either.

 

A circumcision ceremony for children took place recently at the Yamee-oon Islam Mosque in Central Pattaya, which explains what that young Muslim lad meant when he told us he’d lost his pullover.

 

Police raided two South Pattaya restaurants the other weekend and took away eight illegal Burmese immigrants. Two of them were being used as waiters and the other six as ingredients.

 

Those of you who’ve been thinking of going into business in Pattaya will be pleased to hear that do-it-yourself beer bar kits are now available for purchase on Beach Road…

 

 

A seminar was held at the Royal Cliff Resort a couple of weeks ago to celebrate World Environment Day, at which a government representative announced their full support for the production and use of ethanol. Someone should tell ‘em that most of the bars in Pattaya have been selling it for years.

 

Finally, City Hall has come up with a ground breaking new plan to reduce the amount of litter in Pattaya. They’re going to give pointed sticks to the blind.

 

be seeing you

monkeyman

[nohlsson1]

Thanks for keeping this going. I love reading them every month.

[Big_Brian]

Quality as always,

[Obsession]

Good stuff. First time Ive read Monkeywatch..