creation of a pussy

[berettakid 26]

Creation of a pussy

 

Seven wise men with knowledge so fine,

created a pussy to their design.

First was a butcher, with smart wit,

using a knife, he gave it a slit,

 

Second was a carpenter, strong and bold,

with a hammer and chisel, he gave it a hole,

 

Third was a tailor, tall and thin,

by using red velvet, he lined it within,

 

Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,

with a piece of fox fur, he lined it without,

 

Fifth was a fisherman, nasty as hell,

threw in a fish and gave it a smell,

 

Sixth was a preacher, whose name was McGee,

touched it and blessed it, and said it could pee,

 

Last was a sailor, dirty little runt,

who sucked it and fucked it, and called it a cunt.

[berettakid 26]

Lady Diana and Pamela Anderson

 

Lady Diana and Pamela Anderson die on the same day, and they both go before St.Peter to find out if they'll be admitted to heaven. Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so St. Peter must decide which of them gets in.

 

St. Peter asks Pamela if there's some particular reason why she should go to heaven, so she takes off her top and says, "Look at these. They're the most perfect ones God ever created, and I'm sure it will please him to be able to see them every day for eternity."

 

St. Peter thanks Pamela, and asks Diana the same question. Diana drops her skirt and panties, takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, and douches with it. St. Peter says, "OK, Diana, you may go in. Have a nice day."

 

Pamela is outraged. She screams, "What was that all about? I show you two of God's own creations, she performs a disgusting, pornographic act, and she gets in and I don't?!!!"

 

"Sorry, Pamela, but a royal flush beats a pair any day."

[villayouth 37]

[berettakid 26]

A boy in the sixth grade comes home after school one day. His mother notices that he's got a big smile on his face.

She asks, "Did anything special happen at school today?"

"Yes, Mom. I had sex with my English teacher!"

The mother is stunned.

"You're going to talk about this with your father when he gets home."

Well, when dad comes home and hears the news he is pleased as punch. Beaming with pride, he walks over to his son and says, "Son, I hear you had sex with your English teacher."

"That's right, Dad."

"Well, you became a man today - this is cause for celebration. Let's head out for some ice cream, and then I'll buy that new bike you've been asking for."

"That sounds great, Dad, but I can I have a football instead? My ass is killing me."

[berettakid 26]

this man is sitting on a bus when this young nun gets on he think she 's beautiful so he sit next to her and say's "sister i think you the most beautiful women i ever seen will you marry me" she say's " I'm sorry i cant marry you i'm married to god" and with that get's of the bus later as th man's getting of the bus the bus driver say's " I know that nun every morning a five am she's down by the river preying, so next morning he's down by the river dressed as jesus and say's to this nun " sister i am god and your married to me and i've come to consummate the marriage" she's say's oh you silly fucker you've picked the wrong week but I suppose you could do it up the back " so he fuck's this nun up the back , after he's filled with guilt so he say's to himself you've goto tell her so he say's "sister I am not god I am the man you met on the bus" she say's "I'm not the nun I'm the bus driver"

[berettakid 26]

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman.......

 

There is a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere where the following people are stranded:

 

2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman

2 French men and 1 French woman

2 German men and 1 German woman

2 English men and 1 English woman

2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman

One month later on the beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere:

 

The 1st Italian man killed the other for the Italian woman.....

The 2 French men and the French woman are living happily together in a "menage a trois"....

The 2 German men have a rigid weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman....

The 2 English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman....

The Irish began by dividing their island Northside-Southside and setting up a distillery. They don't remember if sex was in the picture, because it got sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut - whiskey, but at least they know the English aren't getting any!

 

 

 

 

 

 

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman went for a round of golf and their wives went along as caddies.

While walking around the course the English man's wife caught her foot in a rabbit hole, tripped up, and landed in a heap on the ground. Her skirt was over her head revealing that she wasn't wearing any knickers! The Englishman stormed over and angrily demanded a reason for her state of undress.

"Well darling," she explained, "you give me so little allowance that I have to make the odd sacrifice. Usually no one notices."

The Englishman thrusts his hand into his pocket and said, "Here's a tenner. Go to Mark's and Spencer's and get some knickers."

Two holes further along the Irish Man's wife caught her foot on a molehill, tripped up and landed in a heap on the ground. Again her skirt was up over her head revealing that she wasn't wearing any knickers either! The Irish man was livid and he angrily demanded a reason for her lack of undergarments.

"Well darling," she explained, "you give me so little allowance I cannot afford to buy undergarments."

With that the Irish man thrust his hand into his pocket and said, "Here's a fiver. Go to Woolworth's and get some knickers."

Three holes further on, the Scottish man's wife caught her foot on an exposed root, tripped up and landed with her skirt over her head revealing that even she wore no knickers! Her explanation to her irate husband was the same as the others. Simply a lack of allowance.

The Scottish man thrust his hand into his pocket and said, "Here's a comb. At least you can tidy yourself up a bit."