Nightmarch 22 January 2003

[PattayaPete 530]

Dance little lady, dance: The Diamond ogling den (Soi Diamond) will be holding its third dance contest, this one on Friday night, January 24 commencing at 9:00 p.m. (that's Thai time by the way: therefore, read 9:30 p.m. and some).

 

The usual collection of Noah's Arkites (i.e., in pairs) will be rounded up from a string of participating chrome pole palaces and, if the fist two contests are anything to go by, it should be a fun night.

 

On Saturday night January 25, Biw, the boss of the Polo ogling den (Walking Street) is planning on holding what she has termed as an 'amazing dance show' contest with the winner to receive a hefty 10,000 baht, runner-up 7,000 baht and the third placegetter 3,000 baht. Nice work if you can get it.

 

A Spicy Anniversary: The Spicy Girls ogling den (in gender-confused Pattayaland Soi 1) is celebrating its fourth birthday on Saturday night February 1 with the usual spit on a dead pig, an 'ox loast' and hot and cold buffet. For those who can't read, the sign out the front also reads: 'balloon chasers bugger off'. With the Elephant Man now looking for greener pastures, a new type of 'animal' has taken up the cudgels after buying a half share in the chrome pole palace. Panda will be on hand to meet and greet from Mondays to Fridays with lazy Ewan warming a bar stool on weekends.

 

Back in the Old Dart: While I'm down there, the Spicy Girls Too ogling den has lost the management services of Mickey Mouse who's returned to the frozen wastes of Pommyland. The operations of Spicy Too are currently being overseen by the duo of G and J. The den opens for dispensing alcoholic beverages at 2:00 p.m. each day.

 

Who let the dogs out? Located in the soi between Pattayaland's 1 and 2, the newly-expanded beer boozer The Kennel has acquired the well-liked Aussie garden gnome Curlie as the new day manager. As well, owner Scootish Dave tells me his boozatorium sponsors the Pattaya Police soccer team (kitted out in West Ham stripes). The local peelers regularly take on teams of expat soccer players and, strange but true, the plod always come out on top. Funny about that.

 

Now that's a slammer: The Tequila Reef noshery and beans-means-fart palace (Soi 7) serves up the kind of Mexican grub that put Cisco in the Kid, the Pancho in Villa and the Speedy in Gonzales. Dishes range from 145 baht upwards, the portions are tasty and filling (unless your name happens to be Sergeant Garcia) and the atmosphere is vibrant and clean. Mine host Rambling Rob lays out the welcome mat to keep his customers satisfied and you definitely don't need the salt and lemon to down his tequila's.

 

Hustler's take note: The Sportsman's boozer and noshery in Soi 13 has started a pool competition on Sunday evenings with all welcome. The entry fee is 300 baht but all the money in the pot is divided into first and second prize-money. Worth a shot if you're good at the pot.

 

A quiet retreat: Mention the name Som Bunsuk Village and many Pattaya locals and regulars will look at you with a blank expression. This little piece of paradise, located in the quiet back streets off Soi Yume, or behind the fishing park on Third Road, has been a part of the landscape for around 15 years.

 

One of its attractions is the village swimming pool and coffee shop, both of which have now been taken over by a Frenchman and his Thai girlfriend after being allowed to run down in recent times. The pool has been cleaned up and the menu features both Thai and European nosh with prices ranging from 35 to 150 baht. The facilities open at 9:00 a.m. and close when the last person decides to call it quits. The owners charge 30 baht for adults and 20 baht for children per day to use the swimming pool; monthly rates are also available.

 

 

My e-mail address is: nightmarch@hotmail.com

Author od Pattaya "Patpong on steroids"

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