Nightmarch 29 April 2004

[PattayaPete 530]

If the government of Fearless Leader is genuinely concerned about the social dislocation caused by entertainment venues being allowed to remain open beyond midnight, then surely the gaze of ministers like No Matter, Preacher Malcontent and Purely Puritanical is pointed in the wrong direction when they demand the emasculation of boozers catering largely to foreign tourists and ex-pats. Their public statements make it clear the government wants to curb under-age drinking, drug selling and taking, and prostitution. Only in the latter is the attack against chrome pole palaces, beer boozers and the like in any way justified.

 

While ogling dens are compelled to follow the letter of the law and close their doors at 2:00AM, and beer boozers and Sierra Tango joints turn off their lights and music at the same time, you could be deaf, dumb and almost blind and still be able to stumble upon a veritable plethora of karaoke joints still kicking on into the early hours of the morning. While they may close the front door and dim the outside lights, most karaoke boozers continue to operate with impunity and rake in the cash from, shock horror, predominantly Thai revellers. By this time the majority of foreign tourists and locals are tucked up in bed with a hot cocoa and a water bottle.

 

Are the peelers aware of what’s happening under their noses? You get one guess. It’s hardly a revelation to note that under-age drinking, selling and taking of illegal substances, and prostitution are almost de rigueur in many of these places. Add to that, drunk riding, shootings, muggings and robbery, and from my limited perspective it seems as though the focus on foreign-run operations seems to be more for international cosmetic appeal than a genuine attempt to reduce social ills.

 

Home Side Keeps On Keeping On: After a break of around six weeks, the Diamond ogling den (Soi Diamond) held its third dance contest for the year on Saturday night 10 April. Some 16 dancers representing the home side (four), Big Willies (two), Marilyn (three), Polo (two), What’s Up (two) and three freelancers gave the judges a tough task, especially when one group decided to employ ice cubes in their presentation and another team had bananas as a prop. Just in case you’re wondering, they ate them during their performance.

 

In the finish, a Diamond dancer narrowly won the contest with What’s Up second and one of the freelancers taking third position. The Miss Flower contest (for the most popular dancer among customers) went to one of the three Marilyn girls. At the time of writing I’m unaware of the date for the next contest.

 

Remember The Alamo: Garrulous Gary, Soi 8’s resident card shark, celebrated his “28th” birthday (this is before VAT, government tax and stamp duty) on 23 April in his bar The Alamo. The boozer is located right next door to the Silver Star ogling den and provides a nice vantage point to watch the comings and goings in that part of the soi.

 

Still Dipped in Gold: It appears as though my statement about the demise of the Goldfingers ogling den (Soi 7) was premature. The chrome pole palace was indeed closed down, but only for three days, and although one of the previous operators has decided to call it quits, the other owners are persevering.

Business seemed reasonable when I wandered in on a Friday evening recently; for a small ogling den there were enough chrome pole molesters to keep punters amused for a while. Chang draught amber is 65 baht, most lolly water goes off at 75 baht and liver wasters are 90 baht.

 

Going to Excess: The Spicy Girls Too ogling den down in gender-confused Pattayaland Soi 1 changed hands in the early part of April and has since undergone a name change and minor refurbishment. Now called 2XS the place kicked off on 21 April with a soft opening. The new owners apparently have plans to turn the joint into a real eye-catcher. Certainly the name is well thought out, the signage outside is brilliant and ranks with the best in Fun Town. The front is bright and inviting and should draw potential patrons to the front curtains.

Internally the changes have been fairly rudimentary, with the wet bar being widened and the lighting is now brighter. The music style has changed and is probably too loud, but it certainly had the dancers shuffling at the rate of knots, and they all seemed to be enjoying themselves immensely.

 

I’m afraid the pricing policy with regard to the libations leaves me baffled. To celebrate their takeover the new owners increased the previous imposts, with Chang amber fluid, in a bottle, at 85 baht while liver wasters went up from 90 to 95 baht. Surely the aim of the management of any establishment is to garner a regular following as well as attract new customers. In order to have any chance in the competition with the Walking Street chrome pole palaces, the joints away from the centre of the action need to offer something different to draw booze artists through the portals. To use an analogy, New York residents know when they go to see a Broadway play they will pay top dollar for their seats while an off-Broadway production is discounted. In Pattaya no one is in any doubt that Walking Street is our Broadway; therefore the joints outside could be classified as off-Broadway. Ergo, they should be offering libations at a better rate than those of Walking Street.

 

It’s not about being ‘cheap’, as one correspondent wrote me recently, claiming I was only interested in finding and promoting the lowest-priced boozers. It’s about value for money. One of the reasons munching dens such as Mata Hari (Second Road) and Chez Georges (Third Road), as examples, do so well is they offer excellent quality nosh in reasonable quantities combined with great service in a clean atmosphere at value for money prices. They’re not cheap, but by comparison with a number of places who think they’re further up the food chain and charge accordingly, it’s no surprise both Mata Hari and Chez Georges do a roaring trade. Therefore, getting back to comparing ogling dens, why would I, or any other sane person, want to spend 95 baht on a liver waster to look at not much more than a dozen average -albeit friendly- dancing maidens when I can pay exactly the same, or significantly less if I was an amber fluid imbiber, and ogle 40-plus of the more attractive (at least physically) chrome pole molesters in town in a place like Peppermint? If someone can give me a good reason why I should spend more to receive less then I’ll happily print their reasoned and logical argument.

 

A Tale of Two Bars: Apropos of the above, I recently spent some time on a Friday evening in the Silver Star ogling den (Soi 8) and then the Planet Rock chrome pole palace (Pattayaland Soi 2). Both were pleasant experiences and in neither place were my friends or I pressured by either the dancing maidens or the serving wenches to purchase lady drinks. I’m not saying we weren’t asked, but when we declined there were no temper tantrums and stamping of feet.

The difference was notable in drinks prices, amber fluid in Silver Star being knocked out at 65 baht compared with Planet Rock at 99 baht. Of all the Top Class Entertainment venues in Pattayaland Soi 2, I’ve always considered Planet Rock to be the most enjoyable. We were in around 12:30AM and the place was reasonably busy, but what struck me most was the friendliness and good-humour of the dancing girls and the bar staff. Mind you, we had the same treatment in Silver Star.

 

Did we have a 52 percent better time in Planet Rock (based on the impost for amber fluid) than Silver Star? The answer, obviously, is no. Is this a reason not to visit Planet Rock? The answer, once again obviously, is no. We had a better value for money time in Silver Star, but I guarantee we’ll be back in both establishments again in the near future.

 

 

My e-mail address is: nightmarch@hotmail.com

Author of Pattaya "Patpong on steroids"

No reproduction without specific reference to: nightmarch@hotmail.com

[ukpunter 0]

In which establishment do we find the lovely Miss Hot Cocoa and her sister Miss Water Bottle?

[BarrioRunner 0]

Pete

 

I just returned from LOS and missed Gary Birthday party by a few hours as we had to head to BKK. The Alamo is a good place to hang out during the day and early evening while awaiting friends for the nights fun.

 

Gee, Gary is older than I am.

[sinbinjack 251]

what has happened to nigtmarch its been nearly a month since the last one

jack