havefunme

she was standing in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast, wearing only the T-shirt that she normally slept in. As I walked in, almost awake, she turned and said softly, "You've got to make love to me this very moment." My eyes lit up and I thought, "I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day." Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table. Afterwards she said, "Thanks," and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck. A little puzzled, I asked, "What was that all about?" She explained, "The egg timer's broken."

Marriage HOW A MARRIAGE WORKS 'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India ,etc. The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar, you know, they have frozen glasses...' He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious.. I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?' You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc. 'But my sweet honey... At the bar... You know....there's swearing, dirty words and all that...' 'You want dirty words, D*ckhead? Drink your f*cking beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherf*cking snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren't f*cking going anywhere! Got it, @sshole?' .........and, they lived happily ever after. Now, isn't that a sweet story lol

i was a bad boy 865.60

good one

must be fun

same as i remeber it but still good

nice joke i like

when you had enough time for a new one

making a copy of a cd is not a crime unless you try and sell it i making back up copys to use so orignal will always be good

in an americans womans bedroom

and now white man go to thailand

sounds like me when playing that game where you hit that little ball and drink alot of beer

me too but who needs to read in pattaya

little boy walks in his parents bedroom and asks daddy whats the difference between pussy and cunt dad pulls down sheet and says thats pussy little boy asks can i touch it dad says no son you might wake up the cunt