Eneukman

Thanks for the info BigD. I was looking at the possibility of staying there when I eventually make the move - providing i can get a good long term deal on rent. Alan

Is the inroom safe at Yensabai electronic or do you use a key to operate it? Also is the room serviced daily or weekly? Alan

I would agree that recording somewhere the date on which the original message was posted would be an advantage. Alan

I think your user name and password are case sensitive. If you get this wrong, you will get the message you're getting. Hope this helps, Alan

and to stab you in the back afterwards. ;D

Got to agree with Rhino and VasH. By 2.00 I'm ready for slumber. I like to be able to get out and enjoy the sunshine, do some swimming etc during the day. But, hey, that's maybe my age ;D ;D Alan

John, I think you're right about this being the American version as it was sent to me by an American. Alan

I received this by e-mail (from an American girl). Thought it was good. ;D ;D ;D Alan The Australian Rules of Manhood (virtually identical to "American Rules of Manhood") Read and weep...... Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances: a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master. b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse. c. After wrecking your boss' car. d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game". e. When she is using her teeth Any Man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his mates. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's fridge is forbidden. Complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your mate's birthday is strictly optional. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. When stumbling upon other blokes watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing. You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend. It is permissible to quaff a fruity alcopop drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless supermodel... and it's free. Only in situations of Moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another bloke in the nuts. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed. If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both - that's just mean. If you complement a bloke on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer. Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a Mate of yours, except if she's withholding s*x pending your response. Phrases that may not be uttered to another man while lifting weights: a. Yeah, Baby, Push it! b. C'mon, give me one more! Harder! c. Another set and we can hit the showers! Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: Both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have s*x with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary. The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal drunken monkey s*x, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to nail her again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was. It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours. Thou shalt not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue. The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets a Playstation 2. END OF STORY!!

Some rules for after the Europeans have won ;D ;D ;D The Rules of Bedroom Golf 1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play, normally one club and two balls. 2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole. 3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out of the hole. 4. For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins. 5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole. 6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary until the course owner is satisfied that the play is complete. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course again. 7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire course, with special attention to the hills. 8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses that they have played or are currently playing to the owner of the course being played. Upset courses owners have been known to damage a player's equipment for this reason. 9. Players are encouraged to bring proper rain gear for their own protection. 10. Players should assure themselves that their match has been properly scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else playing on what they consider a private course. 11. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at all times. Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course to be temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternate means of play when this is the case. 12. Players are advised to obtain the course owner's permission before attempting to play the back nine. 13. Slow play is encouraged. However, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owner's request. 14. It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match. Alan

The way I used to play, the ball would have to be luminous as I was never sure quite where or how far (or not, more often than not ;D) the ball would go. I was actually mad enough to play golf in fog once many years ago. Alan

I had no joy either last time.............. though it was perhaps just as well as my flight out was about 1 1/2 hours late! Fortunately, I had managed to wrangle a free upgrade to business class out of QANTAS. Maybe more like next time. 4 months 2 days and counting. Alan

According to the report there was 189.4mm (about 8 inches) of rain in a few hours. As far as I can see, that seems to equate to the average rainfall for the whole of June and July combined. I doubt whether any drainage system anywhere could have coped with that amount of rain in such a short period. Last time I was in Pattaya, (November last year) I was caught in a thunderstorm - just had to take shelter in a nearby beerbar ;D ;D and when I walked back to my hotel, there were places where the water was above my ankles. It did, however, subside quite quickly though. Alan

That's a great price. Pity I'm not able to come out till November! :( Alan

I'm with you, Fishingtime ........................ only wish I could get to Pattaya more often ............. still 2 years and i can retire there permanently ;D ;D ;D Alan

I'm afraid I prefer BA to QANTAS. My knees tend to seize up after a while and I have to get up and walk about every so often so I always ask for aisle seats when I check in (at Edinburgh). With BA, this has never been a problem but last November I had to fly out to Bangkok with QANTAS and when I checked in at Edinburgh at 3.00 (the flight was due to leave Heathrow at 10.00) I was told that there were no aisle seats available. I kicked up a bit of a fuss at the gate and managed to get a free upgrade to Business Class, which was just as well as for reasons I have covered in a post elsewhere the flight was 2 hours late leaving. We had boarded on time! Business Class was, to be fair to QANTAS, very good with plenty of legroom though the seats didn't fully recline as BA's Club Class do. The food was much the same as economy apart from being offered a glass of champagne on taking my seat. ;D ;D On the way back, I was flying on the BA flight and had my aisle seat pre-reserved. It was very hot to start with on this flight as well, which was due to their not being allowed to have the aircon switched on whilst on the ground. It took quite a while for it to cool down a bit! The air crew were finding it a bit too hot as well! Alan

I've used my credit card a handful of times in LOS without any problems but think I'll be checking my visa account on the internet ,uch more frequently after i come back (maybe daily?) as a precaution. I can then quickly cancel the card if I spot any transactions I didn't make. Alan

In 4 visits to Pattaya, I have seen people come off bikes twice - (in 40+ years in Scotland, I have only ever seen 1 person fall off). The first time was at the corner leading into Beach Road outside the Dusit Hotel. Fortunately, it was a low speed accident and no one was hurt. The second time involved a collision between a motor bike and a van at the roundabout before the Residence Gardens. Again, fortunately this was a low speed accident and apart from a few bruises, the couple on the motor bike were unhurt. Then there were the 2 farangs on a big powerful motorbike (don't ask me the make or engine size cause I haven't a clue ;D) who were riding along 2nd street without crash helmets. They were spotted by the boys in brown who pulled them over whilst ignoring the locals who were also riding without helmets. Alan

I gave up playing golf many years ago but having played with a "mixed" set of clubs, I would say that you should try the clubs out before buying a full set. Some of my clubs "felt" good, which gave me more confidence when playing with them, whereas others didn't. Non-golfers won't understand this but I do believe that how a club feels in your hands is of the utmost importance. If you're at the learning stage, I would recommend that you buy a half set to begin with. I would not encourage you to buy a set unseen from the likes of e-bay. The clubs offered for sale there will doubtless be excellent but they may not be for you. They could be too heavy or they may not be heavy enough. Hope this is of help to you. Alan

Monkeyman, he could always let his tg do all the work thus wearing out her knees rather than his. ;D ;D ;D Alan

Thanks for that tip, Valentino Alan

thanks, valentino i'll bear that in mind next time i'm in thailand hopefully in november. Certainly if i move to live there permanently on 2 years, i'll be buying a thai one Alan

My mobile's with Vodaphone's pay as you go network and I can use it in Thailand though calls back to the UK are expensive at nearly £2 per minute .......... especially when all you get is an answering machine! I also have to pay the international aspect of any calls made to my mobile. Mine is purely for emergencies so it is hardly used. Alan

How about the Kama Sutra? ;D ;D ;D ;D Alan

If you want extra leg room on QANTAS, I can definitely recommend business class - especially if you can get a free upgrade as I did in November. ;D ;D ;D. Seat didn't go right back then to form a flat bed as BA have but seat belt was much longer so you could move onto your side to sleep. Got not too bad a night's sleep. Alan

Sounds like a bloody good deal to me. I don't have the luxury of being able to change travel dates at will so that wouldn't worry me unduly - so long as i had good insurance cover for the unexpected preventing me from travelling. Alan