Thaipan

Beegees tribute band? Sounds like an excellent reason not to go on a Thursday night!!!

Two guys sitting in the office chatting when this girl passes them going to the toilet. Bob says "I think she's nice" Bobs mate "well nip over and give her the patter" Bob "the patter?" Bobs mate "aye the patter" Bob "I don't know any patter, I've never found it easy to talk to girls" "For crying out loud" says Bobs Mate, "it's easy all you have to say is "hello" and she will say "hello" Then say "it's a nice day isn't it" Then she will say "Yes it is" Then you say " but not half as nice as you!" Then she will say "Oh thank you" Then the patter will just flow" Bobs Mate says "look there she coming back out of the toilet, go and give it a go" So nervously off he goes, re-running the patter in his head He walks up and says "Hello" She says "Hello" He says "It's a nice day isn't it?" She says "Yes it is" He says "but not half as nice as you" She says "Oh thank you" Few seconds of uneasy silence.............................. Then he says........................................ "Been for a shite then?"

Looks like a good night was had by all!

I had a super burger here in October along with 2 of my friends before we set out for a night of fun. The waiter had a rush of blood to the head and managed to cock up the bill. When Bob noticed this he sent the waiter out on a mission to find us and ask us to return to the restaurant for a refund. How the hell the guy traced us down to the bar in the Metro apartments, we will never know but he did! We went back to see Bob later and indeed the extra charge was refunded with a smile and an apology. Well done Bob - top marks for customer service and well done to the waiter cos he could not possibly have seen where we were going!!!

Two Englishmen- businessmen in London - were sitting down for a break in their soon-to be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some thick tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling.' No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious Scotsman walked to the window, had a peek, and in a broad Scottish accent asked 'What are you selling' here One of the men replied sarcastically, 'We're selling arse-holes.' Without skipping a beat, the Scotsman said, 'You are doing well ... Only two left!' Englishmen - God bless them - should not mess with Scotsmen

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a date rape drug on the market called 'Beer.' The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large 'kegs'. Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women to whom they would normally not be attracted. After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that 'something bad' occurred. At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as 'a relationship.' In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as 'marriage.' Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females. If you fall victim to this 'Beer' scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you, just look up 'Golf Courses' in the phone book. For a video to see how beer works click below: Women's beer scam Apologies if this has been posted here before!

Love the one about Oor Wullie!!!

Love the tourist police and Pattaya fire department stories

Storm Bar in Soi LK Metro do an superb "Full English" breakfast in 2 different sizes - normal and jumbo! The coffee is excellent as well - not the usual sludge. Can't remember the cost but 99 baht seems to ring a bell. Breakfast available all day and as the bar is right on the corner you get a great view of Lolita's on one side and Hell Club on the other!!!

Hey Monty! You picked the best as usual mate! She is the only one I would have, the rest leave a whole lot to be desired! Mind you some of the customers are not so hansum as you

Good entertainment indeed. I may be a newbie to this board but not to others and have been to LOS many, many times and know that there are some things about the TR that just say so much bad shit cannot happen to one person no matter how naive they are on their first trip to BKK. Sorry, but you don't get my "I'm convinced vote"