John Cleese Syria Hoax

[Patna 3,802]

I am not a fan of reposting articles and I originally planned to put this in the Syria topic but being a hoax and kind of funny, I post it here. It has very little to do with John Cleese, being a hoax, let alone writing it as the OP claims.

 

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada. The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years. The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France ‘s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability. Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.” The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.” Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.. The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be right, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.

 

Regards, John Cleese, British writer, actor and tall person

 

And as a final thought – Greece is collapsing, the Iranians are getting aggressive, and Rome is in disarray. Welcome back to 430 BC.

 

Read more at

 

http://www.inquisitr.com/927897/john-cleese-syria-hoax-and-now-for-something-completely-fake/

[capdagde 1,954]

love it!

[atlas2 4,329]

Old.

[MM 6,562]

Old.

 

Updated from old one tho.

 

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 4

 

 

[Patna 3,802]

Old.

 

New to me. As they say in Hungary ( ) - there's no such thing as old jokes. To a newborn, every joke is a world premiere. And as MM pointed out, the hoax has been updated :)

[atlas2 4,329]

Apologies...........As a Cleese fan I had been excited to open the thread but when I saw and recognised the first line as an 'old been done on here before post' I was disappointed. Hence the terseness of my comment.

 

I should have said......Old jokes are the best jokes.

 

 

However, in case anyone else might feel the same let down in expecting Cleese ............Here's some very 'old' but still 'good' Monty.

 

PS you can see me at the beginning bowing at the great man's feet.

 

 

http://youtu.be/ta1KfRX06kA

Edited August 31, 2013 by atlas2