Nightmarch

[PattayaPete 527]

Dancing for Dollars: Big Andy has decided one of the better ways to draw punters through the doors of the newly revamped Club Electric Blue gogo( Walking Street ) is to run an in-house dance contest on Saturday evening 10 September, kicking off around 9:30PM.

 

One of the problems bar owners find with running dance contests in one gogo while trying to involve the operators and dancing maidens of other establishments is that if the home team walks away with the thick end of the prize money the others think the fix was in'. After a while the damsels from other dens become increasingly reluctant to appear. This is one of the reasons why the Diamond chrome pole palace decided to only host in-house contests. They are easier to organise and are still competitive.

 

The new layout in CEB seems to be working and most nights there are around 50 or so dancing damsels cavorting about the place in various grades of attire. Upstairs is the beaver lounge' where customers can clearly see who shaves and who doesn't. Taking a leaf out of Peppermint's successful and popular innovation, the lasses serving drinks behind the bar seem to have all misplaced their tops.

 

Close to the Best in Fun Town: What is the mix required to take an agogo into the ranks of the top ten or so places to go in Pattaya? First, a good collection of attractive and friendly chrome pole huggers. Second, good music, or at least material that suits the joint in question. Third, reasonably priced libations. Although it falls slightly short on the third count, the Heaven Above gogo (upstairs in Soi Diamond) has improved out of sight in recent weeks and, in my humble opinion, now ranks very close to the best g-string-for-g-string chrome pole palace in the resort.

 

I know one thing for certain: they have the best-looking set of serving wenches and hostesses in town. The dancers range across the spectrum from tall and lean to short and fulsome and everything in between. In other words, there's a dancer to suit every possible taste. The girls vary in dress, or lack thereof, for the stage. Some are in the stock standard g-strings, others in short skirts, still others in skirt, blouse and jacket. It seems everyone has a turn on the stage at some point over and hour or so; for all I know even the cleaner gets a run, sans mop and bucket.

 

The music, initially good when the place first opened its doors only to lose its way for a time, is now well and truly back on track and suits the place.

 

The damsels are, in the main, a friendly bunch (yes, some will hit you up for a thirst quencher within thirty seconds of grabbing your knee-cap), and the vibe when I wandered in around 10:00PM on a Friday evening was very good. I hope management will be able to maintain this buzz for some time to come.

 

We Are Number One: Is this the friendliest gogo in the environs of Fun Town? We Are No 1 (Thappraya Road, Jomtien) may not have the best chrome pole molesters in the joint, but they are great fun. The most notable aspect of the chrome pole huggers in the place was, apart from the fact they are friendly, none asked for a drink. This must surely be a first in the history of ogling dens in Thailand.

 

The joint opens at 2:30PM and bats on until 1:00AM offering draught amber at 65 baht, lolly water 75 baht and liver wasters 95 baht. There's a double screen TV showing good music videos and for those who get too excited by all the attention from the dancers, a good lie down and organ recital can be had upstairs for a total of 800 baht.

 

Thai Logic 101: Hoping to cash in on the lack of tourists (think about it), the New Player gogo (second floor of Soi Diamond) re-opened on 1 August (horses' birthday in the southern hemisphere). It failed as a chrome pole palace when first opened back in December (high season) when it was known as the Roof and, on my only visit so far, the second attempt doesn't look too promising either.

 

The place is nicely furbished, clean and fresh, and has a small pool table to entertain those bored with looking at the five dancers on stage, dressed in black PVC style uniforms. The music varies between awful and average and the prices for libations just don't make any sense. Liver wasters run to 120 baht, lady drinks are 100 baht, but draught amber fluid is 55 baht all night. The logic, if that's the word, seems to be to draw in the punters who want to sample the relatively cheap draught amber. The problem with this is there are at least 10 better quality ogling dens offering cheaper draught nectar all night. Of those places snipping punters who prefer the harder liquor for 100 plus baht, again there are at least half a dozen or more that rank way above New Player. As for the quality of the chrome pole huggers, let's just say no more than three stood out in any way.

 

Cop an' Earful of This: Fun Town is finally coming of age in another media medium with the recent launch of an English-language radio station dedicated to broadcasting about the resort: FM TRS on frequency 102.95. Run by Anna- one of Pattaya's better known media personalities- the station operates from 6:00AM until midnight with plans to go 24-hours, seven-days a week as soon as possible. Apart from music and the usual local news there are interviews with local ex-pats and professionals.

 

No Booze for Youse: Fearless Leader will no doubt be pleased to know the Tops supermarket at the corner of Central Pattaya Road and Second Road is strictly adhering to the government policy of not selling alcoholic beverages in bottles and cans to customers between the hours of midday and 5:00PM. For those who have the patience, it is possible to sit inside Tops, purchase and consume alcoholic drinks while waiting for 5:00PM to come. If this doesn't make any sense to you then I shall use just one word: politicians.

 

Feed the Hungry Beast: The Ruby Club on Soi 6, well-known among those who wander about in the afternoon's looking for a little relaxation and company while having a quiet drink, has recently been sold and the new management has introduced a free buffet on Friday's starting around 4:00PM.

 

Private Dance, Lighter Wallet: According to one of my informants the charge for a private dance in a side room in the fairly new Galaxy Cabaret gogo (Walking Street) is -make sure you're sitting down- 7,000 baht. Repeat it slowly: seven grey notes with the numerals 1000 printed on them. Are there really people out there who are so desperate to get within sniffing distance of a Caucasian female they are prepared to cough up seven big ones for the dubious privilege? The phrase more money than sense' immediately springs to mind. I'm told libations in the joint run to 200 baht a pop, making it just about the priciest joint this side of Bangkok.

 

Now, before the usual conga line of over-bulging wallet types start wailing the traditional refrain of but in England you'd be paying?', I want to point out two things. First, in case you hadn't noticed you are in Thailand and one of the attractions for many people who come here is the fact the place is nowhere near as expensive as a first-world country. Second, I once went to a similar joint in Australia some years ago and the price for a private dance' was AUD$70, or around 1,800 baht in the conversion rate at the time. So, if these figures are correct, then the damsels in Galaxy are charging nearly four times as much in a developing nation compared to what's available in a first-world country. Go figure.

 

Hamster's at Ten Paces: Regular readers of this missive will know I'm not a fan of the tawdry shows put on by some ogling dens, the majority owned by local males who seem to think the average foreigner just loves watching generally overfed dancing damsels fire darts, blow whistles, write messages, and extract razor blades from their front orifice. Goldfish and frogs are also common props but the worst must surely be from the Top Models gogo(Soi 14, off Walking Street) where a friend and his brother recently were witness to the sight of a hamster wriggling its furry way out of a baby-making factory.

 

Piece of Pith: Old people love to give good advice to console themselves for no longer being able to set a bad example.' (La Rochefoucald)

[davethailand 91]

Hamster's at Ten Paces: Regular readers of this missive will know I'm not a fan of the tawdry shows put on by some ogling dens, the majority owned by local males who seem to think the average foreigner just loves watching generally overfed dancing damsels fire darts, blow whistles, write messages, and extract razor blades from their front orifice. Goldfish and frogs are also common props but the worst must surely be from the Top Models gogo(Soi 14, off Walking Street) where a friend and his brother recently were witness to the sight of a hamster wriggling its furry way out of a baby-making factory.

WTF? Won't be going there then.

[alexist 12]

Thanks for takin the time Pete. much more informative since I've been and can now visualize the locations. Heaven above sounds like the spot. Ref the pricing of 7000b... in May of this year I was paying 5000 baht for short time in Spain, can't believe Spain is cheaper than LOS tee hee... will they survive charging such prices, perhaps they depend on the Japanese men?

Till next edition

Regards

Alex

[H 0]

The first and only time i hen into Top models (although i thought it was called Top girls) the dancing wench poped a frog outta her lower regions.......... then a goldfish.

 

Check Bin & outta there faster than a balloon chaser when its his round!

 

 

H

[mastaloopz 0]

The "Pussy Show" cracks my ass up. We saw the frog and the goldfish thing. Actually the gal missed the fishbowl and the fish landed on my friends arm. We laughed so hard, he ran to the bathroom to sterelize his forearm. We were only there about 20 minutes, but I'm sure I had a full ab workout from all the contraction.

 

About Heavens, I saw their website and the gals look great. We're definitely checking the place out our first night back in Pattaya.

 

Later!

- Loopz

[flighty 31]

Re: Galaxy - All drinks for visiting lady guests are 200 baht, then a lady drink for performers is 200 baht with a special lady drink 350 baht.

Or you could go to Top Girls Soi 14 and have a free drink... you know the one where the water turns to coke... (tastes a bit bleachy though)

[aqua4 2]

A Hamster?

[dotcom_OD 0]

Richard Gere may like that hamster show

[stumper 0]

i went to galaxys a little while back for a look,200bt for a bourbon n coke they wanted 600bt minimum for a short lap dance,i couldnt get out of there quick enough.russian girls

[ss 1]

A Hamster eh..........................

 

Thank god there is some life in the "OLD GIRL" that is Pattaya yet !!!

 

Now lets see the present Govt. try and mess with a Hamster's right to work !

[Big Daddy 0]

I have seen the frog/fish thing, but never a hamster!!! not sure I want too see that, and im sure I wont at my kids hamster the same way now, Thanks Pete, I always enjoy reading your post, very imformative.Cheers to you!!!!!!!!!!