Three Dogs

[Peter_F 0]

Three Dogs

A Labrador retriever strolls into the vet's waiting room. Two other labs are there and look miserable. So he asks "what's up guys? It can't be that bad."

"Oh yes" said one. "I'm here to be put down. My owner can't take any more. See, I'm a digger. If it don't move I dig it up. The yard, the rug, upholstery, you name it I dig it up. My owner got fed up when she bought an antique bed spread. Two minutes after it went on the bed I tore it to shreds. Now I'm being put down."

The other Lab said "yeah, I'm a pisser. Same deal. If it don't move I hose it down. My owners had enough when they brought the baby home from the hospital. They put her on a blanket in the floor and I didn't even wait for them to look at the TV - I soaked that baby from head to toe. Now I'm being put down."

So they looked at Lab 3 and said "how 'bout you?" Lab 3 said "I'm a humper and like both of you - if it don't move - it's mine. The other night my owner got out of the shower and dropped her towel. When she bent over to pick it up I hit her with all I had. "

"So you're being put down too huh? Said Lab 1.

"Oh hell no" Lab 3 said. "I'm here to get my toe nails trimmed."

 

The Lion

A circus owner needed a new lion tamer. About a half dozen applicants showed for audition. All were men except one woman. Thinking the woman wouldn't be so good the owner asked her to go first. Get her out of the way and all that. She went to lion's cage, entered and removed her full length fur coat. There she stood totally naked. She then cracked the whip a motioned for the huge male lion to come to her. Then she had him put his paws on her shoulders where he licked the woman from head to toe.

The owner was astounded. He turned to the five men and said "can any of you do anything like that!! One guy spoke up and said "hell yes - but get those lions out of there first!!

[pattaya_mad 208]

very good