THE MALE VERSES FEMALE AT THE CASH MACHINE

[Captain_C 28]

THE MALE VERSES FEMALE AT THE CASH MACHINE

 

A new sign in the bank lobby reads:

 

‘Please note that this Bank is installing new drive-through cash machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts’.

 

‘After months of careful research, Male & Female Procedures have been

developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender'.

 

*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6 Put windows up.

7. Drive off.

 

 

*******************************

 

 

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Apply handbrake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in debit notebook and place receipt in back of notebook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty handbag, locate cardholder, and place card into the slot provided.

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release handbrake.

[BigusDicus 9,835]

Obviously whoever wrote the procedures knows my wife!

[ServiceMan78 0]

yep...sounds about like 98% of woman......

[short 215]

There is a mistake in this procedure.

 

A man rolls down his window before he gets to the ATM and rolls it up after he has left. Thus reducing the steps at at the ATM from 7 to 5.