Nightmarch 3 October 2004

[PattayaPete 530]

An Elephantine Miscalcu- lation: In my last missive I mentioned the inroads the Tiger amber fluid was making into the local booze market, stating it was giving Singha a run for its froth and head. An alert reader quickly pointed out Singha was no longer the market front-runner, that honour being held by Chang, with, he believes, around 60 percent of the liquid gold sales in Thailand. So it seems the Tiger might have the Elephant by the tail. Wouldn’t like to try and predict the outcome of that bout.

 

Two Years On: Persona- ble Belgian proprietor Swa celebrated his birthday and a successful two years of operations for the air-conditioned Grand Center Café (Center Condo, South Pattaya Road) in early September. The café is popular with a number of locals and offers a nice place to relax and have a few quiet drinks or a game or two of pool. As an added bonus Swa has a Frequent Drink- ers Card, giving a 10 percent discount on libations. Everyone is welcome, not just Center Condo residents.

 

A Rose by Any Other Name would be…Dutch: The three sois colloquially known as Day-Night 1,2, and 3 are fast becoming a real centre for budget-priced, filling, quality European cuisine. One of the latest additions is the Dutch Rose (Soi Day-Night 3), on the site formerly occupied by Purple Star. Freshly painted in yellow and dark blue, the noshery offers a daily set menu of starter (soup or salad), choice of about three mains (chiefly of Dutch-style cuisine), and either ice cream or coffee for 135 baht. There is a Muay Thai boxing gym upstairs for those who’d like to work off the excess kilos. The munching den opens from 2:00PM until 10:00PM each day.

 

Bangkok Prices in Pattaya: A friend, recently returned from a brief sojourn in the fleshpots of onomatopoeic Bangkok, said the outside beer boozers on the inside of Nana Plaza were practically bereft of custom when he was there. The ogling dens didn’t seem much busier either. He noted the bar fines in the beer boozers were an astounding 600 baht and was hardly surprised when one bar owner said she’d had just one customer the night before. Apparently, the damsels being bar-fined receive absolutely zilch from the 600 baht. The high prices are designed with foreign businessmen who live and work in Hong Kong and Singapore in mind. They fly in for a weekend of mattress dancing that is still cheaper than what’s available on their own oriental turf; it’s also discreet, away from the prying eyes of workmates and paramours. It’s noticeable that a few boozers in Fun Town are starting to adopt a Bangkok-style attitude with bar fines in some outside establish-ments now running as high as 400 baht; a few Sierra Tango joints are asking 300 baht, plus a 100-200 surcharge for the room and a few ogling dens are now wanting eager punters to cough up 600-1,000 baht for the services of a chrome pole molester.

 

Living Dolls and its sister Living Dolls Showcase (both on Walking Street) have a basic 600 baht fee. In the latter den, the bar fine for showgirls is 1,000 baht before 1:00AM and 600 baht after. In a sense I can understand the high impost: the shows are what puts bums (both literally and figuratively) on seats, and management doesn’t want to lose their star attractions too early.

 

Please Check Your Wallet and Brain at the Door: Two unconfirmed reports from different sources are suggesting the Tony’s late night boogie barn (Walking Street) is engaged in serious price gouging regarding some libations. One claims breezer-type alcoholic liquids are being flogged off at 350 baht while another states that on two occasions he has chatted with young ladies who requested a drink. When the waiter comes over he claims he was pressured into looking at choosing one of those multi-coloured umbrella-sprouting concoctions at 300 baht a pop. He offered the damsel a beer instead. She declined. He then asked if she was working ‘undercover’ for the bar. She replied in the affirmative before moving off, no doubt to find less inquisitive prey. Although I tried to obtain a statement from the management of Tony’s no one seemed able to confirm or deny the allegations.

 

Pulling the Punters In: The gynaecological videos might have gone, but the punters still keep visiting the Champion ogling den (Walking Street) in reasonable numbers.

 

The chrome pole palace does well for three key reasons: they play good music (of the rock variety and therefore a drawcard for the over-35 brigade), libations are reasonably priced (draught amber at 45 baht all night; liver wasters at 75 baht), and there is a veritable brigade of dancing damsels of all shapes, sizes, ages, and breadth of experience. There’s even a show that would put a blind man in mind of having stumbled into a fish shop.

 

Open For Biznet: Barely a day goes by in Fun Town without some new business venture designed to attract the nocturnallyadventur-ous being opened. Of course, for every action there is a reaction, and plenty of places seem to close their doors to the paying public with monotonous regularity. Recent openers have been the Megabreak pool hall in Soi Diana, situated next door to the small and extremely loud bar complex at the Second Road end of the street. It used to be the Bavaria House II munching den and then became Kiss II. I think it has more chance of success as a pool hall. Down in Soi Yamato, the French-run Jolies-Momes beer boozer has changed hands and crossed the English Channel as it were, it is now run by a Pom and has been re-named Absolute (not after the vodka as far as I can ascertain).

 

At the driveway entrance to the old Fight Night Complex on Second Road (opposite Soi 13) a new beer boozer by the name of the Moonlight bar opened for drink dispensing business at the beginning of September. I’m led to believe the boozer is an English-run operation with the boss formerly associated with the popular Queen Vic boozer and noshery in Soi Honey Inn. While the Simon Drinking Street (Second Road, opposite Tiffany’s Show) and the plush Queen’s Park Plaza (Second Road, near Soi 6) both do a convincing impersonation of an expensive white elephant, a few weeks ago yet another small complex of beer boozers turned on the lights and started blaring out the music. This little crutch of mini-boozers are on Soi Buakhow, about 200 metres or so up the road from the colloquially-named Hangar (a.k.a. Cupido). The lengthy reprieve on the removal of the hangar, which had been slated to happen in the middle of last year, continues with no firm date for its dismantling. Some people see beer boozers and say “why?”; others see beer boozers and say, “why not?”

 

Where’s Canute When You Need Him? I suppose if you happen to reside in a place with a name like Basingstoke you could be forgiven for over-indulging in the giggle sauce when visiting the exciting shores of Pattaya. A man we’ll call Steve, because that’s his real name, was spending a relaxing afternoon in a deck chair on Jomtien Beach a hard night on the tiles when he fell into a deep sleep. Steve obviously could sleep for England as he continued in his state of somnolence for so long that the next thing he knew the tide had risen to such an extent the water was lapping at his waist.

 

The heavens had also opened up and a decent tropical storm was engulfing the beach. The worst part of all this was that his mates watched the whole bemusing episode. It’s not known if they intended to wake him before he drowned.

[sinbinjack 251]

whats happened to the next one im waiting with baited breath

[SunnyValentine 173]

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Sunny

[sezme 0]

Hey thanks for the link SV. Had wondered what happened to Nightmarch.