Jump to content
Displayed prices are for multiple nights. Check the site for price per night. I see hostels starting at 200b/day and hotels from 500b/day on agoda.

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 3.4k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client and said to him, "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news."   The art collector replied, "I've had an aw

Posted Images

Did you hear the one about this man from West Virginia who came home and found his wife packing her bags?

When he asked her what she was doing, she said, "I'm leaving you! I just found out that you were a pedophile!" 

The man responded, "Pedophile? That's an awfully big word for a 12 year old."

  • Haha 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure. Then Mrs Claus told Santa her mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even
more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were
out, Heaven knows where. Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered. So, frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum.

When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom. Just then the doorbell rang, and irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas Tree.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

One morning, two Englishmen are strolling down a London street, when they see a stray dog licking its own testicles.

One of the Englishmen turns to the other and says, "Say, I wish I could do that!"

His mate watches the dog for a moment, sighs longingly, and replies, "I should say so! But don't you think you ought to get to know him first?"

Link to post
Share on other sites

This abrasive little chinese guy goes into a bar where a white guy is bartending. He says "Hey honky how bout a gin & tonky?"

The white guy smirks a little and says "Okay." The little chinese man slams it and says "Hey honky how bout another gin & tonky?" And the white man not amused gives it to him and he chugs it.

Then the little chinese man says "Hey honky how bout another gin & tonky?" The white bartender says, "Okay look here you little skeet dumb muthafucka LAST ONE."

The little china man replies "Why?" The white bartender says, "Because I don't like the way you speak to me.... how would you like it if I spoke to you that way?

The Chinese guy thinks about it for a second and says "Okay (as he gets behind the bar, signalling the bartender to the other side)" The white guy pretends to walk into the bar and says to the china man, "Hey slope how bout a drink?" And the china man says, "Sorry we don't serve honkys."

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, VPI78 said:

Q. Why do they sell so many button-fly jeans in Texas?

A. Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile away.
 

Now we understand why Awesum wears button-fly....

Link to post
Share on other sites
16 hours ago, BigusDicus said:

Now we understand why Awesum wears button-fly....

I ain't from Texas.

  I only wear button-fly trousers at work....its a long story.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Glenn and his wife were working in their garden one day when Glenn looks over at his wife and says, "Your butt is getting really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue."

With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measured the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom. "Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!" The wife chose to ignore the husband.

Later that night in bed Glenn was feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks.

She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"

  • Haha 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Three men want make phone call from Hell to remind their relatives about its harsh conditions. Their Nationalities were American, Italian and Iraqi.

It wasn't obvious how much phone charges would be so they decide to go to Devil who is the boss.

The American made a call and the Devil made him to pay 100 USD, then the Italian made a call and the Devil made him to pay 10 Euros on the basis that Italy is less wealthy than the US.

Finally the Iraqi made a call and the Devil made him to pay a cent. Both the American and Italian complain that the Iraqi was being treated preferentially to which the Devil answered; "Your calls were international and the Iraqi's call was local."

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.


×
×
  • Create New...