ff29

An Scottish golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him. Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him. "Arrgh! What happened?" the Leprechaun asked. "Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?" "Thank God, you're all right!" the golfer answers in relief. "I don't want anything. I'm just glad you're OK, and

Doggie, Rick (Thumper^) asked me to relay to you his shirt size: Large - 2XX. Everyone enjoy yourselves and of course Team USA will triumph again. . . but don't let that stop you from having a good time if you're with Team Europe. Regards, ff29 and The Cash Cow PS Hope to see you all at next years 2006 Rideher Cup as we will not be able to get to LOS until 24th of November this year.

Hi Everyone, This year The Ca$h Cow and I will not be able to play in the RideHer Cup. She is needed at her job and can not get the time off that early in November. We will be in Pattaya again this year but will not make it until the end of November. However, the good news is that we will be staying until Feburary of 2006. My wife talked her boss and the company into letting her take her vacations back to back at the end of this year and the beginning of next year. At least we will be able to see a little more of LOS, Thailand on this trip. I know that Team USA will preva

Sorry to hear about the tragic news as are all who knew her. I remember her while sitting at the bar having my coffee or a coke and can say she'll be missed by all who met her and knew her. My wife's and my thoughts and prayers will be there in spirit for her funeral service as we will not be there in person until late November this year. Regards, ff29 and The Cash Cow

Mister C and Others Interested, I've been to Thailand on 4 occasions and my wife and I enjoy golfing greatly. Thailand has a number of great golf course and caddies that treat you well. If you are looking a stamp of approval I can speak from experience that doghaus is your man. My recommendation if you're looking for someone you can trust, is a great organizer of golfing events, and will give you, so to speak, a good bang for your buck, then doghaus and Solor Travel would be a good choice. I am confident you and your friends can trust the new travel company, Solor Golf & Travel, he

Hi Everyone, Here's one to consider. . . BEER HAS BEEN HELPING REALLY UGLYPEOPLE HAVE SEX SINCE 3000 BC! So don't despair. . . SEX help is as near as your favorite local beer bar. Just 344 Days 46 Minutes and 28 Seconds Then Wheel-Up and Off To LOS, Pattaya Thailand. . . But Who's Counting? Regards, ff29

mR hIllY? yoU tnink yi get problnes sneon fukeced u^ Mes k7eyd brodse an its ina Thai*7& Ned hpkep! Regards, ff29

Hi Everyone, The bus ride was a real trip with Hilly trying to get the driver to slow down from lightning speed on the motorway and Ben trying to prevent him from slowing to a snails pace the golf course was a welcome site. Of courese thanks to Ian we overshot the turnoff by only 5 kilometers but considering all it was not so bad. On the golf course the Cash Cow preformed as promised and almost won closest to the pin only missing it by a half a meter. Too bad, better luck next time, and all that sort of rot. The Cash Cow's caddie was telling her, "One putter L to R," and I was telling

To Whom It May Concern: The Cash Cow, thumper^, and myself (ff29) are heading for the airport to start our journey to Pattaya, Thailand - LOS. If all goes well we should arrive in Pattaya at around 02:15 hours 04/11/04. . . if anybody really cares. Looking forward to seeing everyone (oldies and newbies) at the RideHer Cup III for the year 2548 and doing a little small ball. Of course Team USA will once again prevail to retain the coveted Little Man and His Bitch for another year. Our big bird will be leaving the good old US of A in. . . Just 10 hours 52 minutes and 43 secon

Mr SamBinliner, We now have credible inside information from a very FART smeller I mean SMART FELLOW that The Little Man and His Bitch are now safely in custody of friendly hands. They are waiting for Team USA once again this year to win claim to them for another year at the FLB's 2004 (2548) RideHer Cup III. We will call off Genreal Franks-n-Beans, his FART swatters, and the FART sniffing doggies pursuing you if agree to stay out of town. . . for good. Just 1 day 2 hours 33 minutes and 47 seconds then wheels-up and off to LOS, Thailand. . . but who's counting? Regards, ff29

Mr SamBinliner, You make small fun of our worthy team opponent Mr Doghaus who’s haberdasher he adorns that is sot-after by jealous onlookers such as yourself. Do not make further and futile attempts to schmooze our allies like Mr Doghaus into become one of your stinking FART followers. He and his European troups are far to smart for your foolish and translucent attempts at attracting them into your camp with the hollow promise of your 69 1/2 virgins in your hearafter promised land. They have all the first timers they want right at The FLB Bar. Additionally there are many parties at the

Mr SamBenliner, Our competitor in the Rideher Cup III and the grand pupa of this great international golf competition event from across the ocean, doghaus, is pictured below. I’m sure act will act on USA’s behalf as a neutral party and will allow you to return our trophy of The Little Man and His Bitch. This is your absolute (not the vodka) chance to get him back to the competition before the rules committee meeting on 07/11/04 at 20:30 hrs without harm to yourself and your FART’s. 1luv -jump -jump Otherwise, your fate will be sealed forever. Our General Fra

Yes, Mr Glen can get the girls juices flowing. He is told by all of the lovely BG’s at FLB, “You very handsome man papa; We love you too much; We all want to have your baby.†But it would truly unfair for him to perform at the FLB as he is a paid professional performer and the FLB Bar cannot possibly afford his fee even for a brief “5†minute appearance on stage. They would have to layoff the Ugly Brothers for the rest of the high season. Again, just another attempt to impose terror onto the good clientele of the FLB Bar by Mr SamBinliner. Hip gyrating by Mr Glen would possible cause a

Mr SamBinliner, As of this writing we have not been notified that The Little Man and His Bitch has not been returned to it’s rightful owners, Team USA. Our commander and fearless leader General Franks-n-Beans will be in town very soon to see to your termination along with your FART’s. Please accept our very last offer to turn in trophy and save yourself from a needless demise. The 70 virgins can wait. . . there are many TG’s to accommodate your needs until your time in the hereafter. . . it is for a long time no need to rush. Here is our alternative suggestion to the last offer f

The Blue Cross Test Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to get his wife's test results. The lab technician says to him, "I'm very sorry, sir, but we've had a bit of a problem. At the same time we sent your wife's samples to the lab, the lab also received samples from another Mrs. Smith, and now we're not sure which results are your wife's. But, frankly, it's either bad news or terrible news!" "What do you mean?" said Mr. Smith. "Well, one Mrs. Smith tested positive for Alzheimer's, and the other Mrs. Smith has tested positive for AIDS. And we can't tell which is your wif

Where is your underwear? The Englishman's wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear. "Good God, woman! Why aren't you wearing any knickers?" her husband demanded. "Well, you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any." The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, "For the sake of decency, here's £30. Go and buy yourself some underwear." Next, the Irishman's wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she is wearing no u

doughus, Madame (aka The Cash Cow) wishes for you to be gender correct. In the above quote she noticed that her gender appears not to be addressed nor recognized by reffering to i.e. his ball and he plays and so on. Please in the furture use the gender correctness as not to upset The Cash Cow and spoil her milk for us. She also would like to point this out for the recognition of Hilly's (Madame AM) better half. Additionally, she is wondering if you intend to perform as pictured above and would liked to be grouped in your foursome to be witness to this spectical by not getting pas

The Old RopeTrick The other day I came home from work and was greeted by my wife dressed in a very sexy nightie, and holding a couple of short velvet ropes. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So, I tied her up, went to Pattaya LOS, GOLFING (ST), and BG LT! Is this how you handle this kind of offer from your wife or significant other?? Just 15 days 20 hours 4 minutes and 5 senconds then wheels-up and off to LOS, Thailand. . . but who's counting? Regards, ff29 Note: Following this example you may only get one offer per wife/significant oth

THE FASTEST THING ON EARTH? Ever wonder what is the fastest thing on earth? An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?" Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just p

Mr. SamBinliner, You claim to be watching all of the time. . . I am sure you are looking over your shoulder checking to see who or what is on your tail and your FART's? You should be looking in front of you and to the sides of you as well for we now have you surrounded on all sides and closing in faster than you can think. You are no such a smart fellow but more like a FART smeller. Our secret forces have been in contact with B.O. committee members. Why would you want meet up with Mr Tom Morris Senior or Junior (both only 4 time winners of B.O.)? You could aspire to

doughaus, It is true the mighty band of USA's FART swaters are right on the butt of Mr. SamBinliner and his FART's. However, NEVER NEVER should you, doughaus, Mr. SamBinliner, and/or the FART's ever underestimate the intelligence of USA's SWAT team. Nor should you underestimate our fearless leader of the pack USA's FART swater's G.W.B. (Great White Beaver) hunter of all shapes, colors, oders, and sizes of FART's attached to the so called god Mr. SamBinliner. Mr. SamBinliner, your location will soon reveal, through our under-the-cover intelligence through our Thai GPS (Girl Positioning

Latest info tacking down & whereabouts of Mr. SamBinliner. . . Latest deep security report from our snuffer doggies and local operatives under very deep cover in Pattaya, Thailand LOS has reveled to us at our undisclosed location indicate that the so call god SamBinliner's will be hold up near the overpass leading to Jomtiem Beach. At this very moment we have intelligentsia looking at reservations records and at this moment are developing a plan to bring SamBinliner to the justice he so deserves. We will have a full report in our hands forthwith. Our coalition forces after learni

Update on the tracking down and whereabouts of SamBinliner. . . Mr SamBinliner is close to being captured and identified. Our FART sniffing doggie's have reveled to us at our undisclosed location SamBinliner's suspected true identity. All we can say for now to protect the innocent victims of the crazed leader of FARTs is SamBinliner is reported to be losing his hair at a faster than normal rate for a man his age. This may be due to excess u-turns under the sheets while not wearing the proper type head gear or maybe it is just a trait germane to Englishmen? He was also reportedly s

Beer vs. Vagina. 1. Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER. 2. Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA. 3. A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER. 4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA. 5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife/girlfriend may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife/girlfriend may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of

Doghaus, You can not fool our super trained intelligent's agents with their super sharp wit and expertise. We are very close to capturing the abductor(s) of the prize trophy for the RideHer Cup III and we admit that Team USA's captain Matt was in fact responsible. However, in his defense he new he would be unavoidably detained by Miami authorities on his return to America and left Big Ben the FLB beer bender as the responsible caretaker of said trophy. In our opinion Big Ben the FLB beer bender is in fact the sole person responsible for the missing trophy allowing it to get into the ha