Jump to content
Displayed prices are for multiple nights. Check the site for price per night. I see hostels starting at 200b/day and hotels from 500b/day on agoda.

Bar Humor

Recommended Posts

A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It's after midnight. While e route home, he asks the cabby if he would be a witness as he suspects his wife is having an affair, and he wants to catch her in the act. For $100; the cabby agrees.

Quietly arriving home, the husband and cabby tip toe into the bedroom.  The husband switches on the lights, yanks the blanket back and there is his wife in bed with another man! The husband puts a gun to the naked man's head.

The wife shouts, 'Don't do it! I lied when I told you I inherited money.
- HE paid for the Porsche I gave you.
- HE paid for our new cabin cruiser.
- HE paid for your football season ticket.
- HE paid for our house at the lake.
- HE paid for your African safari and even the 4 x 4.
- HE paid for our country club membership, and he even pays my Credit Card bill!'

Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband lowers the gun. He looks over at the cabby and says, 'What would you do?

The cabby replies, 'I'd cover him with that blanket before he catches a fuckin cold.’

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

A woman dies and goes to heaven. She arrives at the pearly gates and is greeted by Saint Peter. There are a few people waiting, so she strikes up a conversation with him.

Just then, she hears a blood curdling scream! "What was that?" she asks." Oh, don't worry about that," says Saint Peter, "It's just someone getting a hole drilled in their head so they can be fitted for their halo.

A few seconds later, she hears another agonized scream, this one even more terrible than the one before. "What was that?!" she asked anxiously. "Oh, don't worry;" says Saint Peter soothingly, "It's just someone getting holes drilled in their back so they can be fitted for their wings."

The woman starts to back away. "Where are you going?" asks Saint Peter. "I think I'll go downstairs, if it's all the same to you," she says. "But you can't go there," says the saint, "You'll be raped and sodomized!"

"That's OK," says the woman, "I've already got the fucking holes for that."

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, BigusDicus said:



Drunk Bars.jpg

The drunk guy at the end of the bar keeps burying his bone in my garden

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   1 member

  • Create New...