Bob Belzy

After months of ill health a guy goes into hospital fro a thorough check up. All tests completed, he is waiting on the doctor to give him the findings. The doctor comes in with a long face, "it's bad news I'm afraid. Your condition is terminal and you haven't got much time". "Oh my god, how long have I got?", the man asks. 'Ten" says the doc, shaking his head. "Ten what", says the guy "years, months, weeks?" The doctor looks at him sadly, "Nine...."

Worried that his eyesight is deteriorating, a young guy goes to the optician - who immediately tells him that he really must stop masturbating. "Why?" asks the young guy, "is it affecting my sight?". "No" said the optician, "your eyes are fine, but you are upsetting the other patients in the waiting room".

Bill Clinton is out on a hunting expedition, but while climbing over a fallen tree he slips and his shotgun goes off hitting him in the groin. Rushed to Walter Reed hospital in a Marines CH53, he wakes from his anaesthetic to find that the surgeon has done a great job to fix the old 'Monica Flute'. After a few days of convalescence, they dress him to go home and as he leaves the surgeon passes him a business card. "This is my brother's business, but you might find it of use" says the doctor. Bill looks at the card and says "why would I need the services of a flute and clarinet teacher?"

What's the difference between a modern airship and 365 blow jobs? One is a Goodyear, the other an *excellent* year.

Quasimodo comes home after a hard day ringing the church bells to find his wife pulling the wok out of the cupboard. "Oh good, is it Chinese tonight Esmeralda?" he asks. "No" she says, "I'm ironing you a shirt for tomorrow." What have Kermit the Frog and Henry the VIII got in common? The same middle name.

A Nigerian scammer walks into a bar with a macaw on his shoulder. The tom asks "where you get him?", the macaw says, "Bangkok, there's thousands of them".

Reading the Ethiopian crash report indicates that it hit the ground at over 500 kts (575 mph or close 1000 km/h) in something like a 45 degree descent angle. The two engines had to be dug out from more than 30 ft below the ground.

I can vouch for that first hand! They weren't even lawyer scum either.

I don't think I'll plan on visiting again any time soon, but thanks for the heads up.

I obviously didn't look close enough. All I noticed were 300+ Baht burgers etc.

I didn't see anything cheap in Terminal 21, including the food. A horrible, fake and useless place.

Can't do that sort of thing in the UK as I read recently; you can be charged for calling a nasty politician a Nazi.

Shit, can't even have humour in advertising these days.

Glad to see we have a lateral thinker on the board.

I noticed that their visa person was kept quite busy when I stayed there in February. I doubt they would be allowed to work out of the Queen Vic if they were dodgy.

Thanks, those are the switches.

Found this article that sets things out quite well: http://www.b737.org.uk/mcas.htm To disable the problem function involves selecting the automatic 'stab trim' off. I've tried to find (without success so far) a photo of the panel showing the switches on the Max, rather than older versions.

Interesting that if the point about the extra pilot is correct, it means that at least one Lion Air pilot had been trained in the MCAS.

Very temporary.

Eyewitness reports are notoriously wrong, whether its aircraft crashes or road crashes. Your average person is neither trained in the subject nor as an observer. Investigators will take them very guardedly. A mate of mine did research on the very subject some years ago for his doctorate; the outcome confirmed the lack of reliability.

That would be the reason.

It's actually 40kg

Presumably you bought the fare because it was cheaper than other offerings? I remember a flat mate rejoicing how he had got a ticket from the UAE back to the UK for 50 quid less than mine. His was on Tarom (Rumanian airline in those days) and required three flight changes, whereas mine was direct. The only thing that didn't happen to him, was being asked to chip in for the fuel like some of those old Aeroflot horror stories......

If would appear that the OP is correct. See the capture here of a example booking, 30 kg for all economy fare rates.