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An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the lads, and have a pint of Guinness.

After a while, he finds himself in a very high-class area...big, stately residences... no pubs, no shops, no restaurants, and worst of all... NO PUBLIC TOILETS. He really, really has to go, after all those pints of Guinness. He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem. As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobby (policeman), who says, " I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know."

"I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really HAVE TO GO, and I just can't find a public toilet."

"Ah, yes," says the Bobby, "Just follow me". He leads him to a back "delivery alley", then along a wall to a gate, which he opens. "In there," points the Bobbie. "Whiz away sir, anywhere you want."

The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom. Since he has the cop's blessing, he unburdens himself and is greatly relieved. As he goes back through the gate, he says to the Bobby "That was really decent of you... is that what you call "British Hospitality?"

"No sir", replies the Bobby, "that is what we call the French Embassy."

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The version I heard it was a different Embassy and the guy is invited to 'miturat and defecate on the Persian rug and wipe his arse on the silk curtains.

 

Anyway thanks.

 

As for the French let's see if their unilateral excursion into Mali lays to rest the old joke....'What's the difference between a Frenchman and a piece of toast?..........Answer: You can make soldiers out of toast!"

 

I Think that's a cue for an English joke.

Edited by atlas2
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Following the current problems in Mali, at the weekend the French announced that they are increasing the level of their terror alert.

 

It’s going from ‘hide’ to ‘run away’.

 

They only have two higher settings: ‘surrender’ and ‘collaborate’.

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