Relationships

[wizzbang 0]

I have been waiting a week to post this but I am not in the members section yet.

I have known my Tgf for 2 years now but her family dont want her to come to the UK because nobody will look after her mum and uncle, like the other 2 kids cant!!!!

I have been to Thailand enough to know that family is #1 but wtf, eh?

It isnt the money, I have lots, its people to actually physically look after them, like buy food, cook, ect. but they arent cripples or anything.

Am

i fucked or what??

[Fondles 94]

Is you TGF the parents gravy train ??

 

If so the only way your going to gain their blessing is to start forking over the coin, you have plenty, jing jing.

[wizzbang 0]

Is you TGF the parents gravy train ??

 

If so the only way your going to gain their blessing is to start forking over the coin, you have plenty, jing jing.

Divorced, father is who knows where, uncle helps out. So basically I just offer them shit loadsof money, forget respect ect, just money?

Can do but it seems wrong.

[lovedog100 1,372]

Promise 5000 baht a month and your problems should disappear.

[wizzbang 0]

Promise 5000 baht a month and your problems should disappear.

I already pay 20k/month.

[lovedog100 1,372]

I already pay 20k/month.

You are paying that to the lady. The 5000 would go to momma and papa while you are in the UK. They are looked after that way.

[wizzbang 0]

You are paying that to the lady. The 5000 would go to momma and papa while you are in the UK. They are looked after that way.

there is no papa please read what I said.

5000 a month won't work, again read my post

[Mav 0]

Tell your girl that if she does come, you will have to finish with her

[laffnliv 78]

You are being played. Run like hell! She can be replaced.

 

Little Roy

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

Tell the lady you will pay all the bills for you both and all the earnings from her job can go to her family.

 

Lots of ladies out there! I agree, you are being played.

 

You set the rules!

[MM 6,562]

I have been waiting a week to post this but I am not in the members section yet.

 

You could have asked to JOIN the forum, but you're in now anyway.

[voracious 31]

Assuming this isn't some kind of wind up. I'll toss this opinion in.

 

If the lady is a good lady, do be aware that some family ties are very strong.

 

It isn't only the Japanese that have a sense of "ON" (obligation to family).

 

If you bring the mother with you so the daughter can take care of her with you in the UK, the family might find that an acceptable alternative.

 

If it's a decent family at all, asking the girl to cut off with the family would be a no-go.

 

edit for clarification:

 

Note: By decent and "good", I'm talking about how a typical Asian family would view another family based on norms and mores which typically stress family over not-family. I'm not making a personal judgment about your girl, who I know nothing about.

Edited May 6, 2010 by voracious

[berettakid 26]

if you have plenty of money would you not like to spend a little more time with her in Thailand and get to know her family a little better ! Trust is a big thing , their families rarely trust us to be loyal and have a long term relationship, they get what they can when they can, but good luck

[codhead 1]

i think you need to give your head a bang no wounder she wont come 20,000 a month what they eating every night steak i think your getting butt fucked i think shel have a thai bloke thats why m8

[packhike 13]

Shouldn't this be posted in the Silly Money thread that MM started??????????

 

But I will take a serious half hearted stab at this.

1.How old are parents?

2.If not to old do they work???

3.What do the 2 siblings do (work wise)

4.Is your TG the oldest in the family?

 

 

If the answers are as follows

1. Young 55 or younger

2. No

3. Nothing but drink, gamble, and fuck off

4. Yes or NO

 

RUN LIKE FUCKING HELL

Would you get involved with a girl from your own country if her family were all a bunch of lazy idiots who wanted you to take care of them and pay all their bills????

[Lucifer007 1]

You're being played like a finely tuned Stardivarius.

[joekicker 53]

if you have plenty of money would you not like to spend a little more time with her in Thailand and get to know her family a little better !

 

This is sort of what I was going to suggest. To the OP - what you are writing, you are saying you are NOT in the family and you're showing no inclination to be in it. Why not consider not being such an outsider? If you are in the family, then all those problems you have disappear.

 

If you're actually serious, 20K a month is an awful lot for the hositility you're getting. There could be more to this story perhaps??

 

.

[Ass Bandit 0]

I have to agree with Joekicker. 20k is a lot to a farm girl, maybe she has a man and is happy to sponge of you.

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

My point earlier still stands. There are lots of poor women. We are assets because we can provide. It is best to make it known quite early in the relationship what the ground rules are.

 

One needs to be in control of one's own assets!

 

Is the op a windup?

[wizzbang 0]

I have to agree with Joekicker. 20k is a lot to a farm girl, maybe she has a man and is happy to sponge of you.

Who said she is a farm girl?

[wizzbang 0]

You're being played like a finely tuned Stardivarius.

Really?

[jacko 8,815]

Really?

Possibly......

You posted asking for opinions, no need to get shirty because you don't like some of the comments.

You haven't supplied enough details for a valid evaluation.... but..

If she is the youngest daughter, there is often some responsibility for a parent.

 

The 20k you give, is it to the TGF or her mother? It is a substantial amount for most Thai families in the villages.

Consider that perhaps you are being played, and go get to know the family.

Edited May 7, 2010 by jacko

[wizzbang 0]

Possibly......

You posted asking for opinions, no need to get shirty because you don't like some of the comments.

You haven't supplied enough details for a valid evaluation.... but..

If she is the youngest daughter, there is often some responsibility for a parent.

 

The 20k you give, is it to the TGF or her mother? It is a substantial amount for most Thai families in the villages.

Consider that perhaps you are being played, and go get to know the family.

I am not getting shirty.

This has gone very off track from what I asked or suggested.

She is the middle child with a brother either side

They do not live in a village but in a city

The money goes to her account

I know the family and I thought they liked me, yet there is that selfish streak of who will look after me physically, not financially, but like I said she has 2 brothers, so wtf?

I did not supply all the information that you or others may like because it is irrelevant the fact is her family will be losing their driver, housemaid and shopper.

Can shee break free or will the family wise up?

[Fondles 94]

II did not supply all the information that you or others may like because it is irrelevant the fact is her family will be losing their driver, housemaid and shopper.

Offer to hire them a live in/housemaid/driver/shopper, should be able to find someone suitable for less than 5k a month.

[jacko 8,815]

I am not getting shirty.

This has gone very off track from what I asked or suggested.

She is the middle child with a brother either side

They do not live in a village but in a city

The money goes to her account

I know the family and I thought they liked me, yet there is that selfish streak of who will look after me physically, not financially, but like I said she has 2 brothers, so wtf?

I did not supply all the information that you or others may like because it is irrelevant the fact is her family will be losing their driver, housemaid and shopper.

Can she break free or will the family wise up?

That makes more sense, she is the youngest daughter, and the oldest.... the only one! Yes generally it is expected that she takes care of her parents.

The brothers are expected to take care of their own families.

The 20k goes to the girlfriend's account?..... do you know what happens to it after that?

 

Your only option is to put forward the circumstances.... that she can come to the UK and live with you, and you will ensure xxx baht is available for her family. You can also explain that she can get work in the UK and supplement this. Also offer regular trips back for her, annual or bi-annual.

The veiled threat that you may 'move on' could make her think hard, but you are asking a lot of her.

 

I don't recommend bringing the mother to the UK at all. (This comment is perhaps more applicable to my circumstances, I would rather have a rabid Rottweiler in the house and I hate dogs... )

Edited May 7, 2010 by jacko