Bar Humor

[VPI78 11,528]

[yorta2 694]

[BigusDicus 9,881]

https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2016/01/museum-beetle-cleveland/?fbclid=IwAR0buKRZ2yBEpS2QT3tFGNeECI8sxWRdaRvJ1HYm6svLLeTOGcAhtHB18QY

A VW Beetle Spotted in the Insect Collection at the Cleveland Museum of Natural History

JANUARY 8, 2016

CHRISTOPHER JOBSON

 

While walking through the Cleveland Museum of Natural History earlier this week, Redditor muppaphone spotted a toy VW Bug hidden amongst a collection of taxidermied beetles. Most likely the joke of a good-humored curator, commenters suggest museums frequently hide objects like this for observant patrons to discover. Love it. (via Laughing Squid)

 

Share this story

 

 

 

[VPI78 11,528]

An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Ireland one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.

After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president’s office. The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, ‘$165,000’.

The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.The president was surprised and asked, ‘What kind of bets?’

The elderly woman replied, ‘Well, I bet you $10,000 that your testicles are square.’

The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.

The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, ‘Would you like to take my bet?’

‘Certainly’, replied the president. ‘I bet you $10,000 that my testicles are not square.’

‘Done’, the elderly woman answered. ‘But given the amount of money involved, if you don’t mind I would like to come back at 10 ‘ clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness.’

‘No problem’, said the president of the Bank confidently.

That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.

The next morning at exactly 10 o’clock the elderly woman arrived at the president’s office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $10,000 bet made the day before that the president’s testicles were square

The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.

The president was happy to oblige.

The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. ‘Of course’, said the president. ‘Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure.’

The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, ‘Oh, it’s probably because I bet him $50,000 that around 10 o’clock this morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Ireland.’

[BigusDicus 9,881]

 

 

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

The DNC just blocked Yang and Williamson dropped out. Iowa in a few weeks and Bernie??? is leading.

What has happened to my old party?

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[kuranda_bagman 135]

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

That car in the foreground is not from 1950s

Not sure what the joke is.

[VPI78 11,528]

39 minutes ago, midlifecrisis said:

That car in the foreground is not from 1950s

Not sure what the joke is.

555, you got part of it ... think it through

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

Attached is the original image. That is how I think things through. hehe

In other research, McDonald's sold it's 15 millionth burger in 1955. The car in the foreground is likely either a 1956 or 1957. We had a new 1956 in early 1957 that looked like that. They had Ray Kroc by then. They sold 100 million by 1958.

Edited January 18, 2020 by midlifecrisis

[VPI78 11,528]

48 minutes ago, midlifecrisis said:

Attached is the original image. That is how I think things through. hehe

In other research, McDonald's sold it's 15 millionth burger in 1955. The car in the foreground is likely either a 1956 or 1957. We had a new 1956 in early 1957 that looked like that. They had Ray Kroc by then. They sold 100 million by 1958.

Try and think out of the box ... Hint ... 1985 movie

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

1 hour ago, VPI78 said:

Try and think out of the box ... Hint ... 1985 movie

That would likely be Back to the Future but the car I mentioned earlier really doesn't look like a DeLorean so I said it didn't look 1950s.

Not one of your best but I do look forward to them!!!!

[forcebwithu 4,856]

Looks like a DeLorean to me, although it appears the rear thrusters got photoshopped out of the pic for some reason..

[midlifecrisis 4,048]

I have seen better renditions of the DeLorean than these offered. Honestly, the original kind of looked like an El Camino.

Just me. What can I say? Sorry to spoil the joke!

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[VPI78 11,528]

[BigusDicus 9,881]

 

GOPHER-BE-GONE

How to rid your yard  of those pesky gophers using a little bit of gasoline.

 

 

Edited January 22, 2020 by BigusDicus