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Displayed prices are for multiple nights. Check the site for price per night. I see hostels starting at 200b/day and hotels from 500b/day on agoda.
BigusDicus

Bar Humor

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A man was speaking to God. "God, why did you  make women so beautiful?" he asked. God said: "I did that to make you love them".

Then the man asked: "Well, God; why did you make them such good cooks?" God said: "I did that to make you love them". The man then asked: "But God, why did you make women so stupid?"

 God said: "I did that to make them love you!"

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I have just deleted a post about tinned ham.

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8 hours ago, jacko said:

I have just deleted a post about tinned ham.

Aw, I did not get to see it.....

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8 hours ago, jacko said:

I have just deleted a post about tinned ham.

Was it Spam?

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An elderly couple go to church one Sunday. Halfway through the service, the wife leans over and whispers in her husband's ear, "I've just let out a silent fart. What do you think I should do?"

The husband replies, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

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A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if he's getting sentimental because they're celebrating 50 wonderful years together. He replies, "No, I was thinking about the time before we got married.

Your father threatened me with a shotgun and said he'd have me thrown in jail for 50 years if I didn't marry you. Tomorrow I would've been a free man!"

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A first time Pattaya tourist saw an elderly guy in a vest with his bar fine ordering a takeaway value meal at McDonald's in Central Festival and then wobble over to New Plaza where he ordered a happy hour 50 Baht Leo. He had noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup at Mickey's.

As he watched, the Vest carefully divided a hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half the Leo into the extra cup and set that in front of his bar fine. The Vest then began to eat, and his bar fine sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap. The tourist decided to ask if they would allow him to purchase another Leo and some gai yang from a nearby grill for them so that they didn't have to split their meal. The Vest said, "Oh no. We've been friends for ten years, and everything has always been and will always be shared, 50/50."

The tourist then asked the bar fine if she was going to eat, and she replied, "It's his turn with the teeth."

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Two elderly women Marie & Edith were out driving in a large car, both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. Edith in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. This time Edith was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the road and the next intersection to see what was going on.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through and she turned to the Marie and said, "Marie! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row! You could have killed us!" Marie turned to her and said, "Oh, am I driving?"

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An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: "I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?"

Patient: "Well, let me have the bad news first." Doctor: "You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left." Patient: "Oh no! That's just awful! In two years my life will be over! What kind of good news could you probably tell me, after this?"

Doctor: "You also have Alzheimer's. In about three months you are going to forget everything I told you."

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70-year-old frenchy went for his annual check-up. He told the doctor that he felt fine, but often had to go to the bathroom during the night. Then he said: "But you know Doctor, I'm blessed. God knows my eyesight is going, so he puts on the light when I pee, and turns it off when I'm done!"

A little later in the day, Dr. Smith called frenchy's companion and said: "Your roommate's test results were fine, but he said something strange that has been bugging me. He claims that God turns the light on and off for him when uses the bathroom at night."

She laughs, "That old fool! He's been peeing in the refrigerator again!"

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