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Bushcraft last won the day on April 2

Bushcraft had the most liked content!

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About Bushcraft

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  • Birthday 10/07/1948

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    Military history, martial arts, missionary work

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  1. I'm reminded of a farang venture some years ago in Isaan that was both weird and bad, but definitely not good. Said Farang invested a considerable sum in leasing a double shophouse in Udon Thani and fitting it out as a restaurant which he intended to run with his Thai GF. This being Thailand, the GF's elderly, widowed mother moved in with them and had her own room upstairs. She also had dementia, and a nightmare unfolded. The restaurant started off well, with both farang and Thai customers, and became quite busy. Then it started: the mother would occasionally wander downstairs to the dining area, walk up to eating customers and cackle "Aroi mai?" while dipping her fingers into their meals and picking up items to pop into her mouth. She'd wander from table to table doing this, causing first the farang to refuse payment and leave in droves, then the Thais. Any attempt by the farang restauranteur to stop the mother doing this, or hopefully get her to live elsewhere, met with fierce resistance from his GF, who was of course in a cleft stick, and the place closed within 6 months for lack of customers. Talk about the best laid plans, who could have factored that into their business model?
  2. They turn right at the flyover, then left into the next soi and join 2nd road just north of the roadworks. Very uncomfortable journey, lots of high bumps on those back sois.
  3. I concur with Jacko's depressing but realistic view of the future in Patts. I've long ceased to go to agogos except on crawls, there is an air of desperation rather than fun in many beer bars, and my beloved Soi 6 is a shadow of its former self for reasons already discussed on the board. I think there has been a concerted and planned project on the part of government to change the nature ("quality") of the tourists who visit Patts. It began to bite at around the time FLB started struggling, the Soi 9, Soi 2 and 3 bars were demolished, and Soi 8 was made unfriendly by knocking 10-15 bars down for one hotel. This project has accelerated under the military regime, and it's working very well for them if one takes this to mean discouraging the sex scene and thereby making Patts less attractive to Farang. Let's be fair, farang have made a major contribution to the wealth of Patts and the economic prospects of many, many Thai families in the boonies, and unless that income is replaced by visitors of a different nature and spending power, lots of small Thai businesses and jobs will inevitably disappear. The exchange rate problem has unfortunately worked in favour of this project. It's equally true that the attraction of Patts to the Chinese/Korean tour groups and Indians is precisely the seedy reputation it has, i.e. the flag-following tours of WS and Soi 6 for the thrill of open eroticism that is absolutely taboo back home. The sex scene at large earns nothing from the Chinese, very little from the Koreans and Japs, and only hard-haggled amounts from the Indians - all in all far, far less than was to be had from the Farang they have decided should be discouraged from coming here. So will the Asian influx take up the slack in terms of Thai incomes? Hardly. Despite a population exceeding 1 billion, word will eventually get around China that visiting Patts to be dragooned around shops selling Chinese-made goods, with precious few other attractions - least of all its beach - is not worth doing. I predict a sudden plunge in Chinese visitor numbers to Patts in around 5 years. The more spoiled and sophisticated Koreans (also usually couples) will smell that coffee even sooner, and only their mongers will come here soon. The Russians are negligible in the equation. And the Indians? Literally dozens of Indian restaurants have suddenly sprung up, perhaps for money-laundering or because the business-savvy Indians predict a large market for their own kind. They also employ almost only their own kind, not Thais, and, if they become too numerous and influential, will encounter resentment that Farang were never made to feel. Indians will not be a major source of employment for Thais in Patts, who risk being displaced with only the landlords welcoming the influx. The Arabs (to use the collective name)? Mongers who eat in their own restaurants and stay in their own areas, living four to a room in the back sois, refusing to bang anything weighing less than 15 stones. In short, in economic terms for the Thai bargirl, dancer, massage worker, shopkeeper, launderess, bus driver etc. etc. the demographic change encouraged by their government will spell hardship that has a knock-on effect back in the boonies, while the massive malls will wonder where serious, paying customers are to come from. This is a case of the rich and powerful investing in a major tourist infrastructure for their own interests, and hang the little people who are unfortunate enough not to have cooking or other, hotel-related skills. They may well regret that investment. Thai travel agencies, airport bus services, tour guides will suffer, as these consumer groups use their own. The list goes on and on. Patts will end up with a huge, self-sufficient Indian population that pushes Thais aside, very few diehard Farang here and there, and oodles of empty hotel rooms when other Asians realise that the town has bugger all for them to spend a holiday on. At least the bloody tourist buses will gradually disappear I suppose.
  4. I've taken 1 Black Ant King pill daily for about 4 years now, and I find this works well considering my age. No noticeable side-effects, though I suspect this is a fairly large dose and may be doing me long-term harm, though long-term is relative at age 70. Unfortunately nothing can bring back the very healthy libido I had up until age 50 or so, but Mr Happy still (usually) rises to the occasion with the help of this stuff.
  5. This one is somewhat lavatorial. Having drunk several beers and eaten an Indian curry prior to boarding, a passenger on the night train from Glasgow to London feels his stomach churning and realises that he needs the toilet pretty damn quick. He rushes down the corridor, tries the door handle of the toilet and - the toilet is engaged. With not a second to spare, and seeing as it's dark outside, he deperately slides the train window down, drops his trousers, sticks his bare bum out of the window and discharges a stream of diarrhoea into the night. Relief. Unfortunately this splatters all over a porter who is wheeling some mail sacks down the platform in a country station that the train was passing at the time, and he's furious as the train speeds off into the night. He gets on the phone to his brother, who is a policeman in the next town. "John, the Glasgow-London express has just passed through, and some bastard on board has thrown a load of shit all over me, can we do anything?" "Well, if we're quick I can get the train stopped when it reaches here, and we can take him in for assault. Can you give me a description of the bastard?" "Well, the train was moving fast and it's dark, but I got a fleeting look at him. He has a centre parting, a very long nose and really swollen tonsils."
  6. King Harold's last words were reportedly: Watch that fucker with the bow and arrow, he'll have somebody's eye out! Another version is that they were: I spy with my little eye, something beginning with 'A'.
  7. Inevitable I'm afraid. I'm 70, and at the end of this month I'm taking my 28 year-old Thai wife to the UK for 10 days. Already looking forward to the comments (mostly from middle-aged women I expect) when I walk down the street with her.
  8. Roundheads 1, cavaliers 0. Never had that problem but sympathise, get well soon.
  9. Just had a long chat on Line with my 35 year-old daughter, who commutes into London every working day. She's disgusted and angry about what she refers to as 50% middle-aged schoolteacher types whom you might meet in the supermarket and 50% long-haired, unkempt or dreadlocked wasters such as you see latching on to any kind of civil unrest. She's particularly upset because she crosses Westminster Bridge each morning, a very beautiful bridge and a major London landmark. It's now closed to traffic by "protesters", which has been bad enough for people going to work, but she says commuters on foot have been abused, had stuff thrown at them and run a gauntlet of scum chanting "We own the bridge". It also stinks of rubbish and urine now. She's bloody furious, not likely to sympathise with this "cause" I think.
  10. There is no doubt that the world climate is changing, as it always has over millions of years. What is hotly debated, and denied by a large body of scientists but propagated by others, is that man is responsible and can do something about it. I don't know, as science seems to have become a matter of opinion rather than demonstrable facts. But it's a global phenomenon, and any action we think will help has to be on an international level. GB has signed up to certain measures along with many other countries, and appears to be honouring its commitments in this respect. Others are certainly not, or not yet. And now a band of like-minded people who are convinced that we (in this case the UK) can do something but are not doing it fast enough have taken it into their heads to block city traffic and disrupt the Easter plans of thousands to make their point. They're doing it peacefully, and by law have to be released at once if removed/arrested, upon which they return to demonstrate. Police leave has been cancelled, and officers can do very little though they must be seething with anger. This is tantamount to mob rule, and is calculated to inconvenience as many ordinary people as possible, otherwise a huge but undisruptive rally in e.g. Hyde Park would have been sufficient to gain public and political attention, but not so much fun of course. I guess they're very proud of themselves. There are laws against obstructing public highways and behaviour likely to cause a breach of the peace, but the kid-gloves are firmly on as usual, when very firm action would be fitting for these unreasonable people. Do we see Oklahomans and Texans disrupting life because another twister is on the way and the US government isn't doing something to stop it?
  11. A doctor has just finished examining his patient, gives a sigh and tells him that things are really bad, he has about 5 minutes left to live. The patient is very upset, in a panic: "Is there nothing you can do for me at all?" The doctor thinks for a moment and suggests: "I could boil you an egg."
  12. A doctor phones his patient and tells him he has some bad and some worse news for him. "Tell me the bad news first." "Ok, the results of your tests have come back, indicating you have only 24 hours to live" "Oh my god, what's the worse news then?" "I forgot to call you yesterday."
  13. Notice in a computer centre Achtung! Alles lookenspeepers! Das computermaschine ist nicht fuer gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fuer gewerken bei das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen das cottonpickenen hands in das pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das blinkenlichten!
  14. A married middle-aged bloke comes to the hospital with his wife, as he's due for a general health check. The admissions nurse tells him he'll have to give a urine, stool and semen sample for the lab to analyse. "Just give her your underpants, dear," the wife says.
  15. A wife is giving birth in hospital, with her husband and nursing staff by the bedside. It's a difficult birth, and the midwife urges her to give one huge push. A tremendous fart rends the air as the baby slithers out. The wife is visibly embarrassed and apologises. Never mind, says the midwife, only usually in this situation it's the wife that farts, not the husband.
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