Bushcraft

You'll really like it Martin, I've had one for a couple of months and it's the bee's knees for easily transportable reading matter. Downloads of new books take only seconds, and the library is vast.

Stabbing a ladyboy in the anus is cruel indeed, it's pretty essential to their livelihood and this one will be out of pocket for a good while I guess. Reminds me of a limerick from way back: There was a young hooker named Hall Wore a newspaper dress to a ball The dress it caught fire And burned her entire Front page, sporting section and all.

IMO the best party yet at the DD, thanks for laying it on and posting the pics.

Same same with dry ginger ale as far as I can tell, haven't been able to get any for a while, and it's my favourite whisky mixer.

Green wellies, brown trousers, blue jacket, yellow shirt, red tie and of course a straw hat - I thought I must look great, but my guide dog growled at the salesman like hell when I bought the stuff.

Lucky you, first serious row I had with my (farang) ex-wife was on our wedding day, when all her huge family were there - I tried to get on the wedding photos.

As we've probably all witnessed many times, the girls will go with chaps who by most peoples' definition are nothing short of disgusting in terms of looks, smell, state of inebriation and behaviour. Even people who fit this description have no trouble in getting laid in Patts, but as we also all know, Thai girls are usually exceptionally clean in their personal habits and assuredly don't appreciate customers who resemble a sack of shit. Money talks, bar life is very competitive for the girls and they'll go through the motions, but as you get to know many of them better, they are not slow to voice their opinions about slobs. For the most part (they're women fercrissake) they certainly notice and care whether a farang has taken a little trouble to be clean, smell ok and wear a freshly laundered shirt when he sets out to Shitter's Bar of an evening. People will usually take you on your own assessment of yourself, i.e. your comportment, and while dressing like a sweaty slob may appear to go unnoticed and be accepted as part of Pattaya's rich tapestry, it says more at first sight about you as a person, and your self-image, than anything else. IMO a clean, nice-looking shirt with either shorts or longs plus sandals (no socks, please!) is quite ok. Walking around shirtless outside the beach area is not, though I've seen it often at the Beer Garden and even when eating at the Pig & Whistle on Soi 7 on one occasion - unbelievable in those surroundings, yet nobody on the staff raised a murmur. As another general rule I think wife-beaters (sleeveless singlets) are dubious around town in the evening too, though I admit to wearing one sometimes if it's really hot.

Just remember to swallow it quickly, or you'll get a stiff neck ..

You're thinking of sharks Paps, snakes have loads of bones - a bloody great long backbone with oodles of vertebrae and ribs hanging off them. They move the ribs to glide along in that creepy way.

Great party, enjoyed myself in the company of the usual reprobates. Nice set of varied pics too, guess who's had too much sun .. That farang lady in pic 2 and others (incl. knicker-shot) is 62 years old - pretty good going when you look at some of the much younger UK talent nowadays. Thanks to TTT and GM for throwing this party, the Drunken Duck is a really good venue.

Bada Bing? The name has a certain resonance. Not Arab-owned is it, I think Badabing is Arabian for 'condom', though I could be wrong (the Arabs invented the condom in 1272, using the lower intestine of goats. In 1853 the Brits improved on this by removing the intestine from the goat first).

Very funny, I love this film sequence - it's been used for a hilarious attack on Ryanair as well.

The Darkside bar crawl went to both Sapphire and Exotica on Monday. There were (I think) 13 of us on the crawl. On entering Sapphire at around 3 pm we found there were perhaps 2-3 ladies in the place apart from the cashier. No sign of the stunners I referred to in my earlier post, let alone bared funbags, but we sat down to await events and have a drink. After about 10 minutes a bevy of (fully clothed) girls made a sudden appearance and the place was transformed. Most chaps (though not yours truly) quickly had the company of reasonable-looking girls, and I think they had a good time with plenty of friendly chat and a bit of hands-on. Lovedog turned up a little later, but was I think disappointed at the lack of mammaries. IMO worth a (return) visit. Exotica was a totally good experience. Plenty of friendly, fun-loving, fairly attractive girls and nobody was left sitting alone, there was practically immediate attention. I will definitely revisit and recommend others to try it - well done to the management and girls, you were great.

So this thieving scum ended up owing you the princely sum of one thousand Baht - bloody outrageous for someone who had not been inconvenienced in the slightest by your premature withdrawal from the rental agreement. Please excuse my sarcasm, but I think you need to reexamine your 'tude a little. It has been established in the past (reported by MM) that far fewer than 90% of BMs on this board are Brits, but those who are Brits (and quite a few others) are rightfully less than impressed with your blanket abuse. Some of us Brits have learned to walk upright and breathe through our noses, though not all.

Quote: "Look out if Lovedog gets let off his leash in there."

Two of us went to Sapphire and Exotica to have a look-see yesterday afternoon. Both places have upmarket decor and are expensively fitted out, very tasteful and spacious. Not that I care if not outrageous, but drinks prices in both venues are reasonable for the ambience. Sapphire had a bevy of at least 20 girls sitting around and talking, joking around amongst themselves, most of them of top agogo quality (most apparently work in agogos after their daytime 'shift') and with numerous extremely nicely enhanced funbags on full view. True stunners some of them, but didn't they know it. The words head and arse came to mind. We were completely ignored, not a flicker of welcome, except by a service girl taking our beer order and by two of the joint owners, who came over to chat - well done guys, nice to meet you. At my age and with my looks I don't expect to be mobbed by good-looking girls when I walk into a place, but IMO they are not doing their job if - especially in a new business - none of them make any effort whatever to make paying customers feel hansum, welcome and happy to return. Exotica had around six young girls sitting outside in the pool area and another six or so sitting inside in the lounge/bar area, chatting to each other. None showed any welcoming signs whatever when we walked in and sat down, then one came over to my mate (bored him silly, as he told me afterwards) but I was ignored. Ended up talking to the mid-40s lady behind the bar - nice of her, I think she felt a little embarrassed that I hadn't merited attention from the ladies paid to give it. I think the darkside crawl on the 21st will include both places, and I'll be on it, so another opportunity to see if customers are still invisible. No doubt other BMs will report back as well.

I don't think you need to apologise at all Ozibill. Wars tend to start not with sudden attacks on people's territory (even the Russians could have seen June 1941 coming a mile off), but with politicians who first sabre-rattle, then whip up a frenzy of hate in their populations to get popular support for a war - very often by generalising about the 'enemy'. Mobilisation and attack comes later in most cases. I'm talking about the modern age, as you were, and I took your meaning.

About as much as being born in a stable makes me a horse

This restaurant deserves to succeed IMO, the food is plentiful, very good and very reasonably priced, the service is attentive but unobtrusive. Top marks from Bushcraft, who also struggled (with mia) to get through the 495-Baht set meal for two. Well done also to Mirkwood for the OP, wouldn't have known about this excellent place otherwise.

Marvellous report Jim, thanks very much for taking the trouble.

Quite understandable that he has resigned, and having a full consulate can't do any harm if you're a Brit. Wonder if we'll see Howard back in uniform on Walking St. anytime soon ..

I think it was before even you were born, Joe

That's truly horrible, poor little kid, and goes far beyond the natural inclination not to get involved which we often see in western societies too. The Chinese are well-known for their apparent indifference to the suffering of others (except family). I once asked my Chinese kung-fu grandmaster why this is, and he explained that it's all to do with the belief in fate. "If I see someone come to grief in some way, that is his fate, and if I render assistance I am interfering in that preordained course of events, which may bring bad luck on me." What a wonderful attitude, it makes you wonder how come Chinese medicine advanced to such a high art.

Thanks for posting the pics and for the very kind comments guys, many much-loved faces to be seen, and the party was indeed faultlessly organised. Thanks to Tony and the team at DD for all the effort, I'm sure a good time was had by all, including Garry and Kookhai's baby Sydney - this was probably his first but probably not last Pattaya booze-up.. attaboy!

As a resident, X-Zone has always been a favourite of mine. The only major downside has always been the blatant and incessant hustling for drinks, which puts free-spenders like myself off even more than it might some others. I suggest a review of beer and LD prices would be a good move, in the expectation that increased volume of customers when the word goes around will then make the required contribution to overheads. I wish xzone nerve every success if he retains the delightful raunchiness of the place. Getting on Frostie's shit-list is actually quite hard, and very unfortunate in view of his standing on the go-go scene, but I'll have a peek myself when I'm back in town and drag him along for a second try if I'm impressed and he's willing.