atlas2

A bit off……but here's another British retailer…... John Lewis' Christmas Vid To remind all you grown up kids of……?

There are certain things I miss from England…….Little things I stock up on and bring back here……Tea is one….Right now I've a cup of Fortnum and Mason's best by my side. When thats gone it will be nice to just be able to pick up some from M&S. White sports socks and underwear…..Blue Harbour linen shirts….. There's not much I hanker after but now being available here there are a few reasons less to go back. I know what you're saying Obsession…. Thailand is changing….but then again... Yesterday after M&S I went to Welcome Inn……..Not been there since the first year I retired…so over 6 years ago. Same old place…..Some of the same old 'girls' "Hello OumTan' rang out as I entered through the back…….Half the girls mimicked the lifting movement, (oumtan) with their arms that I employed to such memorable effect it seems when shagging in the old days. Several remembered my actual name. Some had gained weight and lines…..Well so have I. The rooms were a little more spruce…..and 50 baht more. But the girl I took was still delighted with a 1000 baht. I was ruminating how nice it was to be remembered and how little things had changed in all that time. Then I looked round the car park and saw the skyline……... new hotels had appeared in every direction. Whatever the building developments the fundamentals during my time here have been pretty consistent……… Things like the Android TV box……and M&S now just add to the pleasure of life here. 'Appy Days'

Here's the thin red line response that got the Welsh in trouble………Double trouble lost and fined!!

Yes that shook things up. Well done the Aussies

Yes they have 3 types ….2 special and one labeled 'daily'…Wine as well……Preserves look good and the gourmet breakfast cereals. As Evil says not cheap…... But it's Christmas soon and my mouth is already watering for a taste of 'it'.

On Saturday England will line up for its annual drubbing by the "All Blacks" Fair enough…….But the Kiwis take the initiative and make the psychological first blow with the Haka….. Everyone loves to watch it at Twicks but what should be the permissible response? From today's Telegraph... "All Blacks haka is, for all its vibrancy as a spectacle, scarcely more than a circus display these days Intimidated? All Blacks' haka has lost it's fear factor and is more of a circus act Photo: REUTERS By Oliver Brown, Chief Sports Feature Writer11:34AM GMT 05 Nov 2014Follow Comments667 Comments To grasp the anomalousness of the haka, it helps to transplant it beyond a rugby context. Take the United States basketball team’s recent World Cup match against New Zealand, the wonderfully-named ‘Tall Blacks’. The expression on the faces of Derrick Rose, Kyrie Irving et al as the ancient tribal dance unfolded in front of them spoke not of quavering fear, or steely let’s-see-what-you’ve got defiance, but utter befuddlement. They could not have looked any more perplexed than if they had just been treated to an a cappella rendition of ‘Yankee Doodle’ by Dame Kiri Te Kanawa. The blank response was not quite what the Kiwis had in mind. For if nothing else the haka is orchestrated to stoke fear in the breast of an opponent, thus eking out a priceless early psychological advantage. It is meant, as the throat-slitting gesture sometimes used as a final flourish makes abundantly clear, to be a declaration of war. But if all it elicits in the uninitiated is blank incredulity, then what is the point? Increasingly, the ritual is drifting from any kind of sporting relevance, becoming instead a theatrically-rendered cultural curiosity. It will trigger the usual paroxysms of excitement at Twickenham on Saturday – and it is, I confess, sterling entertainment – but we are suckers for the choreography rather than the message it sends. One might argue that the acrobats of Cirque du Soleil could induce much the same reaction, just without the contorted faces. I realise that every Maori curse in the book will be arrayed against me for the cheek of that comparison. For the All Blacks regard their beloved haka with the utmost reverence, as a sacrosanct ancestral performance, rousing the players into a frenzy for the realities of impending conflict. Given it has been included in every New Zealand rugby international since 1888, they reserve their right to stage it with uncommon ferocity. But when 15 savage men in black are threatening to cut your throat – and this is certainly how the ‘Kapa o Pango’ haka appears, regardless of composer Derek Lardelli’s insistence that the offending motion is a Maori symbol of drawing energy into the body – it ought also to come with the right to reply. The trouble is that whenever the opposing team invokes this, it leads to the most frightful diplomatic mess. At the women’s World Cup in 2010, the Australians dared to advance on the haka by a few half-hearted steps and were promptly fined £1,000 by the International Rugby Board. Granted, Richard Cockerill looked like an idiot when he went nose-to-nose with Norm Hewitt at Old Trafford in 1997, but he resented, understandably, the notion that he should just stand there like a lemon while a presumptuous Kiwi signalled the desire to tear him limb from limb. Taking a righteous stand never works, though, where the haka is concerned. The Welsh Rugby Union tried it in 2006, demanding that the All Blacks ensured the dance was all over and done with by the time Land of My Fathers was heard. This, after all, is how it is supposed to be: the visitors deferring to the hosts, accepting that the Welsh have the prerogative to put their own anthem on last. Instead New Zealand, with that strange air of entitlement, threw a spectacular fit of pique, refusing to conduct the haka on the field and agreeing only to release a video of them doing so in the dressing room. A sense built that the haka was, when all the earnestness about its symbolism was stripped away, merely a form of arrogant machismo. For it stands alone in sport as a unilateral statement of intent, to which no challenge is permissible. Again the All Blacks complained loudly when the Welsh decided, in 2008, that the best riposte to the haka was to stand motionless and stare. This, too, was depicted as a grotesque insult to their heritage. All of which begs the question: what exactly is the right way to react to such a provocative call to arms? Brian O’Driscoll ventured this very point when he was made Lions captain in New Zealand in 2005, and was told gravely by Maori elders that his best course of action was to toss a few blades of grass in the air. Well, that did him the power of good. Fifteen minutes later he had his shoulder dislocated in an illegal spear tackle and was ruled out of the entire tour. The haka, sadly, is hidebound by political correctness, such is the terror at executive level of offending the world’s No 1 side. The IRB are even understood to have protocols decreeing that the All Blacks’ adversaries should not encroach within 10 metres of the venerable act. It all adds to the suspicion that the haka is, for all its vibrancy as a spectacle, scarcely more than a circus display these days. For England’s players on Saturday, the temptation must be to follow the example of Australian great David Campese, who would absent-mindedly kick a ball around in his own 22 while the haka blew itself out. Its sheer stage-management is of a piece with the creeping commercialisation of the All Blacks – what better way to beguile an American audience, or to satisfy shirt sponsors AIG at the match they mandated in Chicago last weekend, than with a mass war cry? Most would-be converts in the US, however, seem to share their basketball stars’ view. Namely, that the haka is now less a part of the sporting fabric than an exotic sideshow." As I've said I enjoy the haka…….but I would like to see a dignified response, (greater than dropping a few blades of grass) that can be accepted without causing deep offense……... The best England can hope for is that the crowd drown it out with a middle-class rendition of an American slave song….. No Morris dancing japes please.

Went yesterday. Loads of good chocolate. Christmas pud was something over 1000 baht. But the large biscuit selections seemed worth it. I will get an advent calendar as a treat. One chocky a day ain't bad

The bread looks good……... But I'll give the french loaves a miss…had two of them and not to my personal taste. Whenever I go for my swim in A1 early, at 5.30ish, (my usual time is 6 am) I often meet in the lift going down one of the employees of the bakers who opens up and cleans the shop at that time. I'm in a sports vest and budgie smugglers she's crisp and smart in her orange uniform……I always feel slightly uncomfortable but make an effort to chat. This bakers is a definite plus.

I had a cinnamon roll from Das B yesterday……very nice. And a lovely lady serving!! Agree with Gonzo. The changes don't seem necessary. The building is rampant…... But adapt or die…...

They will have to make the narrow adjoining sois one ( either) way too. Not looking forward to this hope they adjust the lights where the traffic from 2nd road converges…….. I will still look in all 4 directions when crossing the street……...

Thanks for that. There's a girl without arms selling Thai lottery tickets the some of you may have come across. She writes better 'English' with a pen stuck in her armpit than my clumsy fingers can manage. I find these accomplishments inspiring……I admit sometimes I fill up.

On a serious note..(for a change). Pattaya claims to be a world class resort……And from my perspective that's true…..But.. In the past most of this current heavy rain would have fallen a month earlier during the low low season, when few tourists are around to witness the weaknesses in Pattaya's drainage system……And the holes in it's roads…. This time they've been caught out………It's hard to claim world class status when tourists can see for themselves Pattaya's fundamental inadequacies. It's in all our interests to unblock the drainpipes bricked up by beach businesses………..To take the carpets and cardboard covers off of the man-holes and deal with this recurrent problem with a proper and cohesive plan. I doubt all that many of the tourists here will be back next October…….and word goes round…..

Completely different name... But I'm sure this girl will prove just as adaptable and as popular as the other girl people might be thinking of. Won't be long before someone whisks her off and out of her golf shoes. Good luck to her.

Not an ounce of showmanship……just musicianship and quiet.

The skies looked black but I headed over to the dark side at about 11.45 for my pre-Sunday Roast shag…….The bar I usually stop in was having some maintenance done and no rooms were available…….So went to see a regular at Butterfly. Back for the food and it starts to rain. You all saw it. Cat's and coyotes ………and a plague of frogs for measure. I lingered over the food but the rain wasn't letting up. So decided to risk it. Last time I'd struggled through 'Lake Rumpole Market' I'd lost my front number-plate….I've mastered driving in snow and fog….but floods make me feel hesitant and out of my depth. Debris and mud had been washed down the soi turning it into an African wadi. I got through one but chickened out at the next which seemed yaris exhaust deep. Back up the road…….Found a bar……..had another short-time……An hour passed and the water had receded ….Still took an hour to fight my way back to Jomtien through the traffic jams. But I agree we need the rain for the roses. And at least here as long as you've the money, there's alway's somewhere you can find an open pair of thighs to shelter out the storm between……,

I've been perhaps more times than you……..and not a problem. I've often raved about and recommended the place to friends. But the last two times………I 'went' quite a bit afterwards…….and so did my son and a girl I had with me on the most recent visit. Each of those last two visits we had steaks……and a pepper or mushroom sauce. I eat out every meal of the day here….In 7 years I can still count the dodgy stomachs on the fingers of one hand. Having said that the food was excellent……the venue romantic…(unless you get those soft outside chairs that you sink into so deeply that the table becomes neck height)…... I'll probably try it again……..just need a bit more time for the memory to fade …..A day lost tripping to the bog is not a pleasant memento of a visit.

You're right there…….I'm so thrilled with this………Watching Premier League as I type…….I fear if they can stop this they will.

OK last night my box played up…….Just went off. I fiddled with the wires and tightened connections but it wouldn't stay 'on' So phoned 'Chas' who supplied the box through a friend. He said, 'probably the transformer….If it is I'll change it if it's the box I'll give you a new one. Bring it round tomorrow and I'll have a look for you" Well he couldn't say fairer could he?………So this morning I arrive at his condo. He quickly identifies the problem and gives me a new transformer…….Job done. Not quite…….A little lesson in not leaving my Hola on when I come out of BBC or ITV iplayer. And he checks that all is smooth. He loads a new 'app' that doublse the processor speed…..so now Job done then….? Not quite he then loads two other apps that import HD quality for me to try. It's all the English TV stations in HD……No buffering and another 'app' that just has all the latest films in HD. I feel I'm already sorted for movies but I'm impressed by the quality of the sports programmes. This is an 'extra' that must be paid for…... 350 baht per 30 days…another 100 for the movies too. Top up your account with a 'True-Money' voucher from a 7/11. Chas is an accredited agent and sets me up there and then. Chas could not have been more helpful. Doubling my processor speed makes everything just a little crisper……. What with an M+S in Central now and crystal clear British and worldwide English speaking TV………Plus the girls, the weather and the food……..Thailand just got even better. If anyone wants Chas' number pm me.

My first wife was given one of those, (Not quite as big) by her doctor……She had something called sp fistula in anno. She had to sit on it in a warm bath to stretch her arse I suppose. What's odd now is that when I think back to it….we both just thought it was funny/embarrassing and didn't see any sexual connotations at all.

I liked Momentos but twice now, both myself and either my son or girl I took have had the shits afterwards……Takes the edge off the romantic mood gambling against every fart being a flight of pigeons ……. Too much of a coincidence ...So won't be back..except maybe for a drink. I stayed at Cabbages and condoms on my birthday….again….. I love the place…. Only 'complaint' is the difference in quality of the low season breakfast with the excellent high season selection…….Though it's adequate and quite understandable given the drop in numbers.

I read everything I was supposed to read at college…….But it felt too much like conditioning. "You will enjoy this, check the name on the spine." I rebelled and Flashy led the charge! I don't read classics today…..Though I picked up half a dozen PG Woodhouse on my last trip over to plug a gap…..haven't read 'em yet. Sometimes I'm grateful to my conditioners though. You spot references that would otherwise have gone swoosh……I was watching Sky-Fall when it came out……Sam Mendes layered that one…….Turner, Tennyson…….Doyle…..Orwell . All the talk of 'rats' and later you spot the number '101' on the 'policeman's' lapel when Bond chases his enemy through the underground………..So then you watch the film again because it's become a puzzle to un-ravel. Makes it more interesting……but less about fun and more about patting yourself on the back. I'm more into the Falklands than Vietnam but I'll check out some of the recommendations in this thread. And now for my most embarrassing admission I'm a Modesty Blaise fan. I came across the books in the early 70s……..but never read the strips in the newspapers until recently when my fanship-completest-obsession led me to discover 'Titan' are re-publishing them all. I learned there was an enormous public sensation when Modesty broke the mold and finally got her tits out in a daily paper. After years of syndication and 2595 frames………Here's the famous frame…. 2596 below. And look who turns up!! He gets everywhere……!!!!

It does sound awkward………but may I politely recommend a book on …. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dative_shift ….. to settle the matter to everyone's satisfaction. Read it through it's all terribly straight-forward. PS I really hope you get hold of a 'Flashman'

If 'sleeping' and 'red-tape' were Olympic sports then……...

The only other author I've found for fictionalised history and as good as any text book is Steven Pressfield.... Particularly 'Gates of Fire' which would be well placed in a personal top 20.

The wind was howling as I walked along Beach Rd……..It seemed to say to the coconut trees……..'Hang on to your nuts boys……This isn't yer regular blow-job"