BigusDicus

Y'know,' said the Scotsman, 'I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow there's a little bar called McTavish's. Now the landlord there goes out of his way for the locals so much that when you buy four drinks he will buy the fifth drink for you.' 'Well,' said the Englishman, 'At my local, the Red Lion, the barman there will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two!' 'Ahhh, that's nothing,' said the Irishman. 'Back home in Dublin there's Ryan's Bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then whe

A man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of Viagra. The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose. "Why not?" asked the man. "Because it's not safe," replied the doctor. "But I need it really bad," said the man. "Well, why do you need it so badly?" asked the doctor. The man said, "My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday, my ex-wife will be here on Saturday and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can't you see? I must have a double dose." The doctor finally relented saying, "Okay, I'll give it to you, but you have to c

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HJzy3WSYFM

It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty , or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher sna

QUOTE(BigusDicus @ Nov 22 2008, 03:08 AM) Generally front teeth have two roots. Molars have three roots. 50% more labor and parts. 'parts' was more of a joke Jacko. Actually there is a small filler unit that is sometimes placed in the canal after the root is bored out. Technically a part.....

Generally front teeth have two roots. Molars have three roots. 50% more labor and parts.

I used to reaaly enjoy watching The Lone Ranger! Anybody remember Sky King? Was the daughters name Penny? I used to think she would make a good girlfriend.....

A friend of mine really does work for the Ad Agency that handles the WD40 account. They were filming this when I picked her up for lunch. It was hilarious!

"What's the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home." Ken Hammond. "You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life." Emo Philips "Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one." Woody Allen "It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who." Joan Rivers. "Don't have sex, man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them." Stev

This will make you smile, especially if you are old enough to remember, Clayton Moore...... AKA "The Lone Ranger". http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhB4kDwZu7M

Sam the Bellhop http://www.noob.us/entertainment/awesome-c...am-the-bellhop/

Just shot and produced a very timely short video for WD-40. I would like it to be seen by as many people as possible.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZ42ChFJiaw

Spreading the wealth

Cannibal Dilemma

Thanks to traffic cameras they were able to determine the cause of below accident.

Barack Obama, the lead Presidential Democratic Party candidate, is for banning all guns in America . He is considered by those who have dealt with him as a bit more than just a little self-righteous. At a recent rural elementary school assembly in East Texas , he asked the audience for total quiet. Then, in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands once every few seconds, holding the audience in total silence. Then he said into the microphone, 'Children, every time I clap my hands together, a child in America dies from gun violence. ' Then, l

1) Did you fart? cuz you blew me away. 2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special. 3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea I can't hold it in. 4) Do you have a library card? cuz I'd like to sign you out 5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? cuz I can see myself in em. 6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole. 7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away. 8) Man - 'Fat Penguin!' Woman - 'WHAT?' Man - 'I just wanted to say something that

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the man. "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity." "Really, I've m

I stand corrected.

Obviously you were never a young boy with an imaginary friend......

You cannot.

better

This qualifies:

Perhaps 'cheeky' is the wrong term to describe his attitude?