BigusDicus

This qualifies:

Perhaps 'cheeky' is the wrong term to describe his attitude?

This particuliar one may not have been published:

It could make one cry!

50th Anniversary On their 50th anniversary, a wife found the negligee she wore on her wedding night and put it on. She went to her husband, a retired military man, and asked, "Honey, do you remember this?" He looked up from his newspaper and said; "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married." She said, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that night?" He nodded and said "Yes dear, I said; Oh baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those boobs and screw your brains out." She giggled and said; "That's exactly what you said. So now it's fifty years later, and I'm in the same negligee. What do you have to say tonight?" He looked her up and down and said; "Mission Accomplished."

Geez Mook! Perhaps they shouldn't jump.

A cabbie picks up a Nun... She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies: 'I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you.' She answers, 'My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.' 'Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.' She responds, 'Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic.' The cab driver is very excited and says, 'Yes, I'm single and Catholic!' 'OK' the nun says. 'Pull into the next alley.' The nun fulfils his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying. 'M y dear c hild,' says the nun, 'why are you crying?' 'Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.' The nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party !

First picture from NASA of water on Mars, amazing and outstanding!! http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/image/0504/WaterOnMars2_gcc.jpg

It is always touching when folks demonstrate their concern and warm regards for their fellows...

NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer. BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius. BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex. VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower. P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. BROKER -- What my broker has made me. STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell. STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock. STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves. FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

You have to be an American, exposed to American TV adds over the last 2-3 years to truly appreciate this one.

I enjoyed the dress. Obviously she is very proud. Rightfully so.

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids.. The first guy said, 'My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday.' The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday.' The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.' The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: 'What are all the congratulations for?' One of the three said: 'We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. ...What about your son?' The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.' The three friends said: 'What a shame... what a disappointment.' The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends.'

Family Planning

comment from the cat ...

Epitaph Headstone of Russell J. Larsen in The Logan City Cemetery , Logan , Utah .... I wonder if he died knowing he won the 'Coolest Headstone' contest?

FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO A HAPPY LIFE: 1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job. 2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh. 3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you. 4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you. 5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.

Wedding Invitation

Recently came across below ad: Bike For Sale

I enjoyed it! Thank You.

Yesterday, my laptop was stolen from my car while I was at Big C. Lucky for me, there was a surveillance camera mounted on the wall near my car, and security personnel were able to give me a pretty good image of the suspect. Now the police have asked me to circulate the picture to people I know, to see if they know or have seen the suspect. I immediately thought of you for help on this. If you recognize the suspect, please let me know. I am not really interested in my laptop anymore as it is insured, but I would just like to get my hands on the person who stole it. Does this look like anyone you know?

Are you saying you think he might be a Fudge Pirate?

It is a different world out there

This guy has a tough time! http://video.aol.com/video/weatherman-atta...3070x1200497453

A couple of fun pictures