monkeyman

Let's hope so.

The rumour is that the smallish yellowish investors are going for the more upmarket hotels, so they probably won't be in competition with Mr Patel and his mates.

Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to you all, and welcome to more tales from the mythical place that was once known as Fun City. Ho hum. Well, with the first foreign tourists finally being allowed out of quarantine, the Thai government have introduced yet another cracking idea to woo back the tourists - electronic tags. These measure body temperature, blood pressure and heart rate, and send an alert to the authorities if the readings rise excessively. Reckon there’s going to be a whole lot of hotel room doors being smashed down by the boys in brown before too long. And if that

Greetings Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for dropping in, and welcome to this month’s look at the latest non-events in Tumbleweed City. Well, it looked like Thailand was about to take its first cautious steps in allowing ‘tourists’ back in, though to gain admission you’d have had to be Japanese or Chinese and be prepared to undergo a 31 step administrative equivalent of a special forces assault course followed by two weeks solitary confinement. One wondered why they were giving preferential treatment to the odious little yellow bastards who caused this catastrophe in the first place, an

Guess they didn't know about the signing of the 3 year extension to the lease.

Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap for another month, and welcome to another desperate attempt to wring a few stories out of the bugger all that’s going on in Patts these days. The Pattaya Music Festival is set to go ahead with social distancing measures in place, which are expected to be scrupulously observed by most of the public who say they plan to be as far away from the event as possible. Dodgy electrics have claimed yet another victim after a local Thai chap was blown up and flung from the top of a high building while trying to repair a broken air conditioner. His fate w

Greeting Monkeywatchers, core coon crap for dropping by, and welcome to this month’s dive into the crystal clear waters of Pattaya (more about that later.) Walking Street has been redubbed Driving Street following the introduction of a new temporary rule allowing vehicles to use it at all times. Anyone now caught walking there will be cautioned by police and if found to be drunk may face a walking ban of up to a year. Closing times look set to remain at midnight so bars will be forced to keep sending their customer(s) home early for the foreseeable future. FFS, the infection rate is

Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap once more, and welcome to this month’s look at No-Fun City as it slowly creaks back to life. As foreign tourists continue to have the door into Thailand slammed in their faces, the government is spending billions of baht bailing out their tourist industry by effectively paying Thai people to go on holiday as part of a venture known as “We Tour Thailand”. Hotel rooms, tourist attractions and airline tickets are just a few of the items to be heavily subsidised in order to get the tourist industry moving again. Hotel owners have responded enthusiastica

Greetings Monkeywatchers, and core coon crap for joining us in the arduous task of trying to find something to talk about when there’s bugger all going on. Roll on July 1 so we can start moaning again. Holidaymakers are respectfully reminded that even though coronavirus restrictions are being eased, social distancing measures must still be strictly followed. In order to ensure compliance, patrons of bars should be aware that they will only be allowed to take girls back to their rooms if they are accompanied by a police officer. To help facilitate this, larger beds are being installed in a

All three?

Methinks more mask wearing will be introduced to offset the relaxation of social distancing rules. Makes sense politically.

And all for benefit of their customers I'm sure. How many of us would be prepared to make such a sacrifice?

Shit, I missed that one. That's much better than the currency exchange story I used. Thanks for the heads up. I might use it next month.

Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap to you all, and welcome to this month’s disease-ridden gander at what’s happening round town – or rather what isn’t. Pattaya’s finally taking its first faltering steps out of lockdown and as places start to open up, new regulations are having to be observed. Customers in restaurants, for instance, have been told they must wear masks except when they’re eating. Well what else would they be doing in a restaurant? Talking of masks, all the Pattaya currency exchange places now have signs up saying “NO MASK NO ENTRY”. How times change. Just a few

Thai Airways has now filed for bankruptcy.

This is Lou, who wrote, produced and recorded the original version of the song, and is apparently the only Belgian to have a chart hit in the UK. The public face of Plastic Bertrand was a guy called Roger Jouret, who mimed to Lou's voice. Lou has lived in the Pattaya area for many years and has often been seen in Papagayo and its environs. I've seen him in there myself. Parts of the video were filmed in the old Yuth Bar on Second Road between Soi 2 and 3.

Time for a little Pattaya music...

Rodney Bewes

V for Vendetta

Fred Gwynne

Greetings Monkeywatchers, showaddy crap for dropping in, and welcome to this month’s look at the shenanigans in Patts, where things are carrying on as normal. Okay, so there are no bars, no Go Go’s, no restaurants, no girls, no alcohol and no going outside your house most of the time, but apart from that it’s business as usual. Well, the Pattaya curfew is well and truly in place and the police have said that anybody breaking it will face a prison sentence, though given the extent of the current lockdown that’s not really much of a deterrent. In fact, the lockdown in Pattaya is now so

That should get you awarded a gold star for self isolation.

The bar news might be a bit of a struggle.

Greetings Monkeywatchers and core coon crap for joining us once again, though you probably haven’t got much else to do at the moment. Ho hum. Predictably, the Kung Flu is still dominating the news in Pattaya. City Hall has announced that pretty much everything has been cancelled for the next six months, including Songkran, the Pattaya Music Festival and the Beach Road Frog Trampling Contest. A long list of cancelled events has been published, though most people don’t seem to have been aware that most of these events existed in the first place. As Joni Mitchell once said, you don’t know w

That's a shame. I've used WestEast in the past and they always did a good job.