BigusDicus

All of you international travelers should be aware of this important warning notice from the government of Mozambique.

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Top Ten Country & Western Songs: 10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine. 9. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman But I Woke Up With a Few. 8. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me. 7. I've Missed You, But My Aim's Improvin'. 6. Wouldn't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Scared She'd Win. 5. I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're Still Here. 4. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I M

'Okay, here's the plan:' 1) Back off and allow those men who want to marry men, marry men. 2) Allow those women who want to marry women, marry women. 3) Allow those folks who want to abort their babies, abort their babies. 4) In four generations, there will be no democrats!!! 'Man, I love it when a plan comes together!'

Is this statutory rape???

The numbers a dropping fast. LA Times this week anounced more cuts. 15% less printed pages and cut several hundred jobs.

Demographics of American Newspapers 1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country 2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country. 3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles. 4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts. 5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country -- if they could

25 plus years ago I had a Cadillac Seville. Met a girl at an El Torito Mexican restaurant. Was married at the time and did not have a place to take her. We drove up El Toro Canyon Rd, I turned off onto a little dirt road and drove a hundred yards or so. We were making out on the front seat (caddy's were bench seating back then, no center console), I stood up on the seat, my head and torso out the moonroof, facing the rear of the car. Stuck my dick in her mouth. She was very good, did not take me long to cum. I was standing there in bliss, looking down at her face with my shriveling dick

Amen!

I think I would put the teenagers under having a stroke category

I wonder. Does Viagra work at 75 after a life of hard living, drugs n booze?

Well gee, you know how simple minded I am Joe.

Funny! Was this really on Letterman?

Yes, but it would be money wisley spent on a house in her name I would bet....

Military Rules Marine Rules 1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one. 2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough. 3. Have a plan. 4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work. 5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet. 6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a '4.' 7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive. 8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diag

Whether or not you are a country music fan, this is truly the work of a deep thinker, and highly intelligent person. So simple, yet so profound. Words of wisdom from that Famous philosopher Willie Nelson, on his 75th birthday: 'I have outlived my dick'

Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing.... You're okay with it, because you get to watch sports and play on the Internet all night... You hear her stumble into bed around 4 and laugh knowing she's going to have a monster hangover.... You wake up next morning and go outside to the family Volvo, which she used last night.... You sigh in relief because it's all in one piece.... You circle the car looking for dents and find none.... But ... Wait a minute ~

I have stayed at the Whitehouse several times over the last 3 years. Generally speaking my experiences have been positive. I stay in the standard rooms. My visits are usually 3-4 weeks. The costs difference for a deluxe room or suite really adds up. I have friends who have stayed in the suites or deluxe rooms. Seem very nice. My rooms have always been clean and well maintained. About the only complaint I have is that they seem to have some kind of drainage problem. There can be a bit of a smell from the drains in the shower/bathroom. They do have a hardwire ethernet Inte

The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.' Yes, she says, 'I remember it well.' OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?' Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!' A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having

After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here's the final word on nutrition and health: 1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us; 2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us; 3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us; 4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us; and

Absolutely correct sir!

Hilarious!

I tried using them once. They did not show to pick me up at BKK.

The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer. So a United Way volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office. The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community through the United Way?' The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 'First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and she has huge medical bills th

Right across 2nd Rd at Soi 13 there is a new mall with a huge shiny new gym.