Bar Humor

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

An atheist was seated next to a dusty old cowboy on an airplane, and he turned to him and said, “Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”

 

The old cowboy, who had just started to read his book, replied to the total stranger, “What would you want to talk about?”

 

“Oh, I don’t know,” said the atheist. “How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?” as he smiled smugly.

 

“Okay,” he said. “Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?”

 

The atheist, visibly surprised by the old cowboy's intelligence, thinks about it and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”

 

To which the cowboy replies, “Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don’t know crap?”

[BigusDicus 9,878]

 

[BigusDicus 9,878]

 

[BigusDicus 9,878]

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

 

"There is another theory which states that this has already happened."

 

-- Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

[biggles 509]

Thanks for these, never watched him before. He talks a lot of sense and I like the way he pokes fun at both sides of politics

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look...

Edited July 8, 2022 by BigusDicus

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[Bushcraft 2,579]

A heavy breather phones a woman's number.

"Do you have an unshaved, tight cunt?"

"Yes, but he's watching the TV right now. Who shall I say is calling?"

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

 

[BigusDicus 9,878]

The original (longer version)

 

 

[Shooter 864]

2 hours ago, BigusDicus said:

 

109 here today.  Wish I had one.  ?

[MrMango 670]

2 hours ago, Shooter said:

109 here today.  Wish I had one.  ?

It's 110 today in Vegas....

[yorta2 693]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

[BigusDicus 9,878]

 

What is better than roses on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

[sinbinjack 251]

If you don’t pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?