The Odd, the Bad and the Wierd

[Butch 3,456]

I'll have even money most of us have seen something in Pattaya which ticks one or all three of the above boxes.

How many remember The Glitter Man? - A well educated and articulate European Genteman who spent his afternoons riding around town like this (photo credit to Stickman):

He did bring happiness into peoples lives and I spoke to him a few times, a very affable and chatty guy.

I think that ticks the "Odd" box.

For "bad", well we have so many examples to choose from, but for me, the tragic story of a baby girl being found dead on wasteland near Jomtien, with the umbilical cord still attached is the most heartbreaking and sad, simply because the poor girl never even had a chance given to her.

To think she was crying and reaching out for help, food and love while I , and literally hundreds of others who would have stopped at nothing to have helped her were probably sat in a GoGo bar somewhere within 10 minutes drive is galling.

The Weird.

One particular day I'd decided I'd had enough "quiet" nights in (2 on the trot due to a bug), so I had 3 days worth of saved cash at 77 baht to the pound, which was give or take, was around 24k in baht. I decided to make myself feel better to get a haircut, a shave and a face spa, so headed out to the Salon where I left after an hour looking and feeling great. That evening I had my sights set on really kicking the arse out of it, full on fun. Barfining possibly 2 good looking girls for a song pooying, or pinging a stunner. Either way I wanted it to be a night to remember.

I dressed up in some good clothes, new jeans, shirt, plenty of aftershave. Even the grumpy cow of a receptionist at the Residence Garden told me I looked great and smiled. I was set.

But I wasn't. I was totally invisible. Girls simply ignored me. My first stop of Pattayaland 2 GGB's yielded nothing, even Mistys drew a blank. Girls were either Barfined, expecting to be barfined and in more than one case, didn't want to be barfined. My ego was beginning to take a bit of a hammering, and in the back of my mind an element of doubt began to creep in. I moved onto Walking Street, heading to the recently opened "What's Up" GGB, knowing an Ex Lipstick hottie was working there who preferred the colour of baht over everything. I knew that she would be up for a barfine and at this point was was beginning to field the outlandish idea that I'll pay 2k baht LT. I entered Whats up, she was on the stage so I immediately got the Waitress to get her a drink and for her to come down and sit, which she did after 2 dances, but not with me.

Everywhere else was the same, I was running down blind alleys, Club EB , Dollhouse , Happy, peppermint, Catz, Boesche, Paris and even X Zone. The girls weren't ignoring me, but I was running into excuse after excuse not to be barfined, and the ones that were an option were not the ones I wanted, by any stretch of the imagination.

By now I had almost given up, so I decided to have a drink in the last chance saloon, Marine Bar. Nothing but an Euro trash sausage fest. Insomnia at this time was located near the Arab Quarter, having just opened so I gave it a miss and ventured to Hollywood Pattaya. Loud music, plenty of girls but only one of me. After an hour and nursing a bruised ego  as well as arguably the biggest anti climax since the Y2K bug, I decided to walk back to my Hotel. I didn't even look at the receptionist. I refused to meet her eyes as they would be able to read the true depths of my despair and sorrow, not to mention embarassment.

Upon entering my bedroom I thought to myself I must be the only 30 year old guy in Pattaya with 20k baht in his pocket who couldn't even find a girl.

It was a night to remember alright.

 

 

[Brewmaster 28]

Butch, a great read and sums up life in Pattaya.

1) You mean the Glitterman is no longer around?- he use to stop for tourists and the like to take his photo and have a chat - certainly a character among characters.

Elvis - the magician also comes to mind.

2) Extremely sad and happens no doubt too often in what we see as our fun town.

3) Wrong aftershave or did you put the socks down the back of your undies instead of the front?

 

[yogi100 1,925]

I had a chat with GM once outside the Butchers Arms. All went well till I told him my name, shook his hand and asked him his name. A strange look came over his face and he said that he was James Bond! He was definitely a bit weird. On reflection for someone to ride about on a push bike dressed up like a fairy god father in that heat they've got to have a screw or two loose.

Few of us will never be a 30 year old guy in Pattaya with 20k baht in his pocket ever again Butch.

I'd gladly settle for that even if it turned out that I also went home empty handed.

But as you get older the nights you go home alone become the rule rather than the exception. The novelty eventually wears off and nor can you be bothered with the blue tablets nor the sachets of Kamagra..

[lounge_lizard 108]

FWIW, Glitterman (in full fig) was sighted in Merton High Street, South West London yesterday.

Edited September 12, 2019 by lounge_lizard

[jacko 8,814]

48 minutes ago, lounge_lizard said:

FWIW, Glitterman (in full fig) was sighted in Merton High Street, South West London yesterday.

Well that is interesting. Kinda nice to know he is still pedaling around brightening up a few people's day. All except the cabbies I expect. 

[Bullfrog 2,224]

There is a bloke I've seen cycling around soi Buakhao with a coconut tree on the back of his bike...When the tree gets too big he replaces it with a new coconut plant ......I absolutely love sitting in quiet bars during the day watching the weird go by !!!!!

[awesum4 2,333]

Butch that was one really sad story about your disappointing night.  Definitely one for the weird files if a man of any age cant find at least one girl to relieve him of a substantial sum of money.

[Barhop 197]

10 hours ago, Bullfrog said:

There is a bloke I've seen cycling around soi Buakhao with a coconut tree on the back of his bike...When the tree gets too big he replaces it with a new coconut plant ......I absolutely love sitting in quiet bars during the day watching the weird go by !!!!!

Yes, saw him last month on the Poon, a number of times.  Maybe a screw loose but he looks happy and harmless.

[knortyboy 155]

3 hours ago, Barhop said:

Maybe a screw loose but he looks happy and harmless.

You've just described almost all the members of this forum. ?

[awesum4 2,333]

7 hours ago, knortyboy said:

You've just described almost all the members of this forum. ?

I resent the implication that I only have one screw loose.

[JONPAT 222]

A screw loose is better than a screw lost ?

[maipenrai 473]

How about that wild-looking character with the ponytail sticking out of the back of his otherwise-shaved head, always charging around town on a four-wheeled ATV? I've been trying to get a photo of him for years but am never in the right place at the right time...

[teelack 9,639]

Interesting topic and brings back a few memories.

The problem is that every day in Pattaya brings forth some weird sights. As for the Glitter Man. I cannot recall the whole thing but I tried to photograph him one day and he got pissed off at me so thanks for the excellent photo in the thread. There are so many eccentrics floating around but some of my favourites are the Cellphone Man in Soi LK. He goes around at march pace having these long conversations I assume with no one. Then there is the guy who works for Scooters, well I assume he is paid. He is about 4ft 9 and wears western gear including a stetson. I have never figures what he does. Then there is the tall and very busty katoey who works at the Rockhouse. I always have a friendly chat but she/he can be outrageous when in the mood. There is another guy who has sat at the same bar from open to close in Soi Buakhao. I call him Rex but who knows but all day long he sups large Chang's and I haven't even see him go to the toilet.  There are many others but if I was to hand out a prize it would be as follows. 

Each and every day I see "Mr. Everyman" who is any of a few hundred guys held together with spit and chewing gum who have great looking ladies on their arms looking after their every need. I am all for that but for sheer courage its the guys who have lady-boys for a 'Girlfriend'  and who look like guys in dresses rather than feminine katoey. Vive la difference!

 

[Butch 3,456]

50 minutes ago, teelack said:

Interesting topic and brings back a few memories.

The problem is that every day in Pattaya brings forth some weird sights. As for the Glitter Man. I cannot recall the whole thing but I tried to photograph him one day and he got pissed off at me so thanks for the excellent photo in the thread. There are so many eccentrics floating around but some of my favourites are the Cellphone Man in Soi LK. He goes around at march pace having these long conversations I assume with no one. Then there is the guy who works for Scooters, well I assume he is paid. He is about 4ft 9 and wears western gear including a stetson. I have never figures what he does. Then there is the tall and very busty katoey who works at the Rockhouse. I always have a friendly chat but she/he can be outrageous when in the mood. There is another guy who has sat at the same bar from open to close in Soi Buakhao. I call him Rex but who knows but all day long he sups large Chang's and I haven't even see him go to the toilet.  There are many others but if I was to hand out a prize it would be as follows. 

Each and every day I see "Mr. Everyman" who is any of a few hundred guys held together with spit and chewing gum who have great looking ladies on their arms looking after their every need. I am all for that but for sheer courage its the guys who have lady-boys for a 'Girlfriend'  and who look like guys in dresses rather than feminine katoey. Vive la difference!

 

Sometimes it is us who might be perceived as odd by others. I've been asked before "what the fuck are you doing in Pattaya then?" when my answer to his question was "I'm not here for the girls". Much of a muchness as my friendly barber who has been cutting my hair for 35 years might say.

We've all met wannabe's, millionaires and retired Special Forces guys, but some people have an edge about them beyond the norm. I recall the girl with a skinhead who would walk around Soi Yamato shouting Thai obscenities at farangs back in the 90's. With long hair and some make up she could walk the catwalk. Her face was perfect but her eyes full of pain and suffering. Pale face lady, the Thai guy found dead in a Skip covered in facial tattoos sponsored by evil farangs who thought it was funny to give him money and get him drunk then to get his face tattooed (I knew him as "Bert"). The blonde farang walking around Soi 10 pickig up litter and putting the bricks all in line that had fallen foul of local construction. More recently, the farang walking LK in just a pair of shorts with a distended belly, dirty hair and face and a beard with shit all over his legs, drinking from the Buddha offerings.

Sometimes , as a non monger, to sit back and watch this utter madness take place in the bars and the Sois, can make me feel the loneliest guy in town.

[jacko 8,814]

23 hours ago, Butch said:

Sometimes it is us who might be perceived as odd by others. I've been asked before "what the fuck are you doing in Pattaya then?" when my answer to his question was "I'm not here for the girls". Much of a muchness as my friendly barber who has been cutting my hair for 35 years might say.

We've all met wannabe's, millionaires and retired Special Forces guys, but some people have an edge about them beyond the norm. I recall the girl with a skinhead who would walk around Soi Yamato shouting Thai obscenities at farangs back in the 90's. With long hair and some make up she could walk the catwalk. Her face was perfect but her eyes full of pain and suffering. Pale face lady, the Thai guy found dead in a Skip covered in facial tattoos sponsored by evil farangs who thought it was funny to give him money and get him drunk then to get his face tattooed (I knew him as "Bert"). The blonde farang walking around Soi 10 pickig up litter and putting the bricks all in line that had fallen foul of local construction. More recently, the farang walking LK in just a pair of shorts with a distended belly, dirty hair and face and a beard with shit all over his legs, drinking from the Buddha offerings.

Sometimes , as a non monger, to sit back and watch this utter madness take place in the bars and the Sois, can make me feel the loneliest guy in town.

Butch, it ain't much different in the UK except they have to wrap up better. 

[Bullfrog 2,224]

On 9/14/2019 at 11:14 PM, maipenrai said:

How about that wild-looking character with the ponytail sticking out of the back of his otherwise-shaved head, always charging around town on a four-wheeled ATV? I've been trying to get a photo of him for years but am never in the right place at the right time...

He used to try and get inside the knickers of the owner of "The Bitch Bar" on Soi Khopai but that has now closed down and she has since moved to Rayong.... I think the chap is German, pleasant enough and his legs are paralysed so if you are looking at pinching his ATV and crutches you'd probably be able to take the handbrake off and push it away........

[Bullfrog 2,224]

On 9/15/2019 at 6:08 AM, teelack said:

Interesting topic and brings back a few memories.

There is another guy who has sat at the same bar from open to close in Soi Buakhao. I call him Rex but who knows but all day long he sups large Chang's and I haven't even see him go to the toilet.  

 

What bar does Rex use???? .....I'm a little worried it might be me......in the past of course..

[teelack 9,639]

What bar does Rex use???? .....I'm a little worried it might be me......in the past of course..

It could come to me but he was there every day when I passed by. That was less than 2 weeks ago. Funny thing is that I was thinking the other day that since I first noticed him he has turned from brown hair to mostly white. I think that I go to Pattaya too much!

Sent from my Nokia 6.1 using Tapatalk

[Bullfrog 2,224]

17 minutes ago, teelack said:

It could come to me but he was there every day when I passed by. That was less than 2 weeks ago. Funny thing is that I was thinking the other day that since I first noticed him he has turned from brown hair to mostly white. I think that I go to Pattaya too much!

Sent from my Nokia 6.1 using Tapatalk
 

Thank fuck for that - I haven't got any hair ....

[Bushcraft 2,579]

I'm reminded of a farang venture some years ago in Isaan that was both weird and bad, but definitely not good.

Said Farang invested a considerable sum in leasing a double shophouse in Udon Thani and fitting it out as a restaurant which he intended to run with his Thai GF. This being Thailand, the GF's elderly, widowed mother moved in with them and had her own room upstairs. She also had dementia, and a nightmare unfolded. 

The restaurant started off well, with both farang and Thai customers, and became quite busy. Then it started: the mother would occasionally wander downstairs to the dining area, walk up to eating customers and cackle "Aroi mai?" while dipping her fingers into their meals and picking up items to pop into her mouth. She'd wander from table to table doing this, causing first the farang to refuse payment and leave in droves, then the Thais. Any attempt by the farang restauranteur to stop the mother doing this, or hopefully get her to live elsewhere, met with fierce resistance from his GF, who was of course in a cleft stick, and the place closed within 6 months for lack of customers.

Talk about the best laid plans, who could have factored that into their business model?     

  

[js007 795]

On 9/12/2019 at 12:27 PM, Butch said:

I was totally invisible. Girls simply ignored me.

I had a night like that once.  I had more than enough money for anything you could imagine, but nothing happened. It was pouring down rain and maybe I looked like a soaking wet mess?  Maybe it was too late in the evening? Something wasn't right.  

[jacko 8,814]

5 hours ago, js007 said:

I had a night like that once.  I had more than enough money for anything you could imagine, but nothing happened. It was pouring down rain and maybe I looked like a soaking wet mess?  Maybe it was too late in the evening? Something wasn't right.  

Sounds like a rainy night in the old Silver Star on Soi 7. Once it started raining heavily outside, they knew you were going no where, and nobody else was going to arrive and it became a holiday. The Thai music came on and it became a bit of a party. You may think that sounds good, but the farangs became invisible too. Perhaps they knew the boss wouldn't be round. 

[Bullfrog 2,224]

1 hour ago, jacko said:

Sounds like a rainy night in the old Silver Star on Soi 7. Once it started raining heavily outside, they knew you were going no where, and nobody else was going to arrive and it became a holiday. The Thai music came on and it became a bit of a party. You may think that sounds good, but the farangs became invisible too. Perhaps they knew the boss wouldn't be round. 

I'd be well up for an afternoon of naked Mor Lam dancing ... especially if the girls were over 50...!!

[teelack 9,639]

As I wander around Pattaya I often see those barrows with toys piled high. I also note that there some really ugly looking plastic pigs, dogs, cats and what have you. I have never even bothered to look at them until a couple of days ago. 

The TGF usually calls me when she finishes work and with the time difference this is manageable. The other night she was sitting on her bed bashing hell out of a large plastic pig. When that was finished she started on another one of similar size and after that yet another one. The story is that each day she puts her change and some of her tips into a piggy bank and as she is heading home it was time to smash the shit out of them and see what she has to play with. Its her sons birthday and this is her party/present money. All up about 10,000 baht. I always have believed that Thai girls have zero forward planning skills but I now have to eat my words.